


Like A Chocobo Feather

by Sh1k4r1



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Angst, Brotherhood: Final Fantasy XV, Canon Compliant, Canon Disabled Character, Canon Universe, Depression, Eating Disorders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Canon, Romance, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Sex, Slow Burn, Smoking, Suicide Attempt, Teenage Dorks, University, Wheelchairs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2019-11-01 22:48:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 34,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17876225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sh1k4r1/pseuds/Sh1k4r1
Summary: With Niflheim having invaded Tenebrae a few months before the Marilith attack, prince Noctis neither had the chance to meet Lunafreya, nor the Oracle's magic healed his wounds.When Prompto first meets him, Noctis is a shy eighteen years old sitting in a wheelchair.





	1. The Royal University of Insomnia

**Author's Note:**

> Even the smallest change in a timeline, just as heavy as a chocobo feather, can lead to enormous repercussions. This fiction takes place in canon universe, with the only difference of Tenebrae becoming imperial ground a few months earlier; as a consequence, when the eight years old Noctis gets injured in the Marilith attack, his wounds can't be healed by the Oracle's magic, leaving him in a wheelchair for life. Furthermore he neither meets Lunafreya, nor he befriends Prompto in his early teenage years.
> 
> This fiction is actually a different take on a concept I started working on almost a year ago. For various reasons I abandoned the original one, but I eventually decided to give the story new life incorporating my OTP and new themes in it.

**The Royal University of Insomnia** , usually abbreviated as UInsomnia, is the Kingdom's most prestigious university. Located at the core of the economical district, just a couple of miles away from the Citadel, the main campus is settled in a thirty-storeys glass building whose sleek design can compete with that of the corporation-owned skyscrapers nearby. Despite the neighbourhood being impeccably connected by public transport, with ten different underground lines servicing the area, a polished black luxurious car approaches the building, parking right in front of the entrance. A tall and slender young man wearing an exquisite black suit leaves the driver's seat, making his way around the car towards the back passenger seats after retrieving some gear from the trunk. The man's gloved hand gracefully opens the door, helping a boy not yet in his twenties out. The teenager is not nearly as spotless as his retainer, his pitch black hair kept untidy with bangs cut long enough to fall on his midnight blue eyes. Still, his features are boyish and pretty under the hair covering them, only a hint of sadness blemishing the softness of his lips.

"It's okay, Iggy," the boy snaps lightly, escaping the tender grip of the man helping him stand as he lets himself drop on a wheelchair. He whispers a sigh as he sits, more out of bother than relief.

"Are you sure, your Highness?" Asks the elegant man, his voice betraying a slight concern.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. See you later," cuts short the teenager, hastily turning his wheelchair around and steering himself towards the building. He waits at the entrance until the car turns the corner, disappearing from his sight, then he retrieves a packet of cigarettes from his jacket; Coeurl Blue, his favourite brand. His lips turn upwards in a mischievous smile as he takes a deep drag. He's eighteen years old, meaning he can legally smoke if he wants to, no matter how contrary his retainer is. Of course, it feels a bit childish to keep hiding this nasty habit of his, but Ignis would really throw a fit if he knew. Anyway he deserves some little joy in life, right? And now, since he has to face his first day at university, he legitimately needs a treat; something to help him relax a bit.

Being the Crown Prince of Lucis isn't an easy task, people always expecting him to be flawless. But he lost his chance to be the perfect prince charming ten years ago, the day he lost the use of his lower body. He heavily breathes out a cloud of smoke as he stares at his limp legs, a matte black knee brace wrapped around his left knee over his jeans. He's glad he didn't listen to Ignis's advice to wear something formal on his first day; with a white T-shirts and his favourite jacket - the black one with a behemoth embroidered on the back - he's less likely to be recognised as the prince. Of course, everybody in Lucis knows about the miserable wheelchair-bound heir to the throne, and he's quite sure some magazine must have gossiped about him being admitted to the renowned UInsomnia, but fortunately he's stayed out of the spotlight long enough for nobody to identify him straight away. Or so he hopes.

He tosses the butt in a nearby dustbin and heads to the elevators in the hall. He's relieved to see the doors are wide enough for him to comfortably slide in. He glances at the buttons on his right, they're a bit high but still reachable, so he presses the one to go to the nineteenth floor without needing any help. Gods, he hates when people force their help on him, he lived like this for ten years, he learnt how to do everything on his own. But what he hates even more is the expression of pity in their faces; that's why he moved away from the Citadel three years ago. As if all the bows and formality and _your Highness_ didn't make him already uncomfortable enough.

Noctis fixes his eyes to the floor to hide his flushed face as he passes a group of giggling girls. They rightfully guessed who he is given the look on their stupid faces. He tightens his grip enough for his knuckles to turn white, a heavy breath escaping his lips as he finally enters his classroom. He'll never get used to this, the endless whispers of people always talking _about him_ and never _to him_.

He catches some empty seats in the last row at the back of the room; the one on the corner is going to be his, he decides, quickly reaching it. He knows there's always some spots for people _like him_ at the front, but he hates those. So he pushes himself up and shifts to the bench. When the Marilith severed his spine it didn't leave him entirely paralysed, meaning he can still feel and control his legs to a certain degree. But definitely he hasn't enough strength in his lower limbs to stand his weight without major support, way more than crutches can provide. Anyway, even if he cannot walk, the little responsiveness he has is sufficient to help him switch places with little effort. So he does it every time he can, leaving his wheelchair for a normal one making him feel less inadequate.

  


**"Um, sorry, do you mind if I sit there?"** Prompto timidly asks a black haired guy, pointing at the vacant seat next to him; he's sitting in the corner all by himself, looking slightly bored as he scrolls through his smartphone. The blond had quite a hectic morning, getting lost for nearly half an hour in the crowded streets of the Insomnian rush hour, so all he wants now is to quietly disappear in a corner. May his lack of sense of direction be damned, as if finding the UInsomnia building itself hadn't been challenging enough, he spent a good fifteen minutes running around the floors to locate his classroom. It's only thanks to his strict fitness routine - the same one that got him admitted to the prestigious institute as a member of the long-distance running team - that he managed to reach his classroom with five minutes to spare.

"Yeah. Wait, I mean - of course you can sit," the black haired boy mumbles in a warm deep voice. He barely looks back at the blond as he heavily lifts himself, leaning on the desk the whole time with all of his weight clearly held up by his arms. His weird position gives Prompto just enough space to clumsily squish and stumble to his place. "Thank you," he manages to mutter when he finally sits, busying himself with retrieving stuff from his backpack until the flush has faded from his freckle-splattered cheeks. Eventually he'll have to face the guy nearby, he thinks as he buries his face in his _elements of biology_ textbook, but now is not that moment. Anyway, he can swear the ravenette's face is still a light shade of red too when he peeks at him the moment the lesson starts.

  


**Noctis scolds himself for failing** to answer properly. Why has he always to be so awkward, dammit. Obviously, to his excuse, he's not used to people talking to him, let alone sitting next to him. There was a time when he thought people always kept their distance from him because of some odd non-written royal protocol, he remembers. But that was many years ago, now he's quite sure others outright avoid him. Not that he can really blame them though, he's quite a failure for a future King. Actually he's not ever sure he'll ever be able to become King at all; with his magical powers crippled as much as his body, he can barely manage to summon a sword from his Armiger on a lucky day, leaving a task as demanding as powering the wall protecting Insomnia far out of his possibilities.

  


**Prompto's first lesson turned out** to be a complete disaster. Despite the teacher covering introductory stuff, he could barely get a grasp on the topic. On his defence, his absent-minded self forgot to put his contact lenses in that morning, so the mere task of reading from the whiteboard was a challenge. He so wishes he's simply struggling due to his short-sightedness, but truth is that what got his score up enough to be admitted were his sports performances. _Shit_ , what if he truly isn't cut for this? He's all jittery, continuously shifting on his chair, squinting and hastily scribbling down obscure numbers about amphibian reproduction just in time before professor Yeagre wipes everything clean. The blond grimaces; he enrolled to study arts and photography, so why on Eos was it mandatory for all first year students to take at least one science class?! This is going to be the end of him.

"You can copy from my notebook if you want, what you've gotten down is full of mistakes," the black haired boy sneers suddenly, glancing at the mess on Prompto's page.

"Um, thanks dude. I forgot my lenses," the blond replies, blushing so deep that his freckles are barely visible anymore, "plus I'm a huge dumbass that shouldn't really be here." The other's writing is round and clear, his notes spaced by doodles of monsters here and there.

"Me neither as I'm supposed to be a politics student, but I wouldn't get as much free time if I took statistics or something," the guy maliciously grins, his words implying he consciously signed up for something useless for his career, but that for some twisted reason still fulfilled his course requirements. Either had he done it because he's lazy or because he's insecure about his capabilities, he surely has a point, Prompto thinks, staring at him in amusement. He looks a bit too cute to become a politician, but who is he to judge?

"Anyway, I'm Prompto," the blond introduces himself, trying his best not to sound a creep. 

"I'm Noctis, nice to meet you," the ravenette smiles shyly, clumsily fidgeting at the messy hair on the back of his head. He keeps his eyes fixed on Prompto until the poor guy finally gives in, burying himself into his notes, trying to figure out what's so interesting about frogs. He knows he's pretty awkward himself, but this classmate of his is challenging all social conventions. Or maybe the blond accidentally smudged his face with ink, the horrid though striking him hard. Gods not that again.

Then something catches his attention. "Is that Ray Jack?" he asks, pointing at Noctis's scribbles. He just can't keep his mouth shut for a moment when he's anxious, and the lesson is an impenetrable cluster of obscure notions anyway.

"Uhm yeah, I know it's bad," he nervously tries to discharge the subject, retrieving his notebook despite having been the one to offer it in the first place. 

"No, I think it's cute man," Prompto leans forward to peek blatantly at the doodles again, not caring one bit about his bashfulness.

"Hey, that's rude," Noctis snaps, face flushed to a deep shade of pink as he hastily shuts his notebook. "So, you play King's Knight?" he adds, as if he weren't pointing the obvious. The freckled boy must have played for endless hours to be able to recognize the videogame character from the botched drawing he made.

"Yup, I usually play as Tobi. And you play as Ray Jack I guess," he nervously giggles, cheeks more crimson than ever. If this guy Noctis proved to be even a fraction of the nerd Prompto was, King's Knight could easily provide days worth of conversation. 

"You got it. If a game has swords in it, I'm in," he declares, confirming both of Prompto's suspects that he played as Ray Jack and that he was a nerd. Not so bad for a boring day of lesson.

  


**Exchanging a few words with Prompto** was nice. He was a little fidgety and weird with his manners, but who was Noctis to judge when he himself had a lot of trouble socializing with people? Something about the blond he immediately liked was that, unlike all those other students stiff in their neck ties and miniskirts, he was wearing casual clothes, just like him. He was also rather intrigued by his peculiar style, the golden hair spiked up resembling a chocobo butt, skinny jeans and an oversized burgundy knitted sweater. He wondered if Ignis would have approved something of the sort; probably not, as his advisor was obsessed with button-up shirts.

Other than the trivial fashion details, he appreciated how Prompto treated him like a normal person. Maybe he just didn't know who he was; geez, it's not that he's got a label stuck to his forehead saying he's the Crown Prince after all. But that leads to troubles: should he tell him who he is? He quickly discharges the thought, there's no need for the blond to know just yet, given that he's probably never going to see him again. He's aware how he looks a bit aloof, his detached attitude pushing people away. But it's not that easy to open up to people when for the whole of your life they try to befriend you only for your title, not being concerned about your personality at all. Would him even be interested in knowing Noct? He's probably over thinking it, Prompto's going to run away after he sees he's in a wheelchair anyway, that thing always scares people off.

The lesson ended, so Noctis eventually reaches for the folded wheelchair abandoned behind the seats, opening it with one hand and swallowing hard as he lifts himself up with the aid of the desk. He sluggishly lifts himself up and finally drops on his chair, letting out a heavy breath. Physically the task is a breeze, but emotionally, even after all these years, it's still hard. He wishes he hadn't glimpsed at the look in Prompto's eyes when he aimlessly stared at him, making his face redden. He swallows hard again, eyes fixed on the floor. This shouldn't feel humiliating.

  


**Prompto feels utterly** stupid for having failed to notice the wheelchair forgotten in the back of the room. If he had noticed it, it would have occurred to him that it was likely to belong to Noctis, so he wouldn't have stared with that dumb face of his, mouth open and all. Because he did see the brace on his knee after all, and the effort he had to make to allow him to reach the vacant seat. Unfortunately what is done is done, so now he has to find a way to fix things up. Not even considering the option of running away - he gets that he's a little messed up, but he's not that shitty of a person - he forces a smile on his lips and starts talking too much again. "Um, I think I'll grab a coffee now, you want some too?" the blond clumsily asks, biting on his lip when he looks into those deep blue eyes. There's embarrassment in them, but not the slightest hint of anger.

"Yeah, sure," Noctis assents, nervously rubbing at the back of his neck. Prompto feels so relieved that he doesn't hate him.

"Do you know where the vending machine is?" he asks, hiding his nervousness the best he can by laughing it off, "I swear man, it took me at least fifteen minutes to find the classroom this morning."

"Yep, follow me," the black haired boy assures, a smirk peeking on his lips as he easily steers his wheelchair out of the classroom. "So, what course are attending next?" the freckled guy asks, doing his best to keep the conversation going as they go down the hallway.

"Lucian History. Rather boring, right?" Noctis chuckles, "and you?"

"History's still more interesting than frogs! Anyway, this must be your lucky day dude, because I picked that one too," the blond grins, the cheeky tone in his chirpy voice betraying how he is clearly pleased to have a companion to chat with instead of taking notes.

"You chose history because it's easier than other stuff?" Prompto teases, entertained by the serious expression appearing on the other's face as he ponders what to answer.

"See, there's some stuff I am supposed to know. What about you?"

The answer doesn't make much sense, but Prompto doesn't bother questioning further; as far as he's concerned he's already lucky enough to befriend a smart kid on his first day. "I'm in the art and photography course, so history was one of the suggested classes," he explains.

Surprisingly there is no queue, so the blond swiftly inserts 100 Yen into the vending machine. "What are you getting?"

"I can buy it myself, you know." Noctis complains slightly embarrassed, reaching for the leather wallet in his bag. It's clearly high-end Justice Monsters Five merchandise, Prompto's pretty sure about it because he almost got one himself for Shiva's festivities, finally going for the King's Knight one instead. This guy had a nice taste.

"Yeah, but dude, this way I'll have an excuse to see you again tomorrow" he points out slyly, mimicking a gun with his fingers and shooting in a theatrical way.

"I'll have a can of Ebony then, thanks," the black haired boy cheerily grins back, satisfied with the explanation. "So, Prompto, are you really sure you want to see me again?"

"Why shouldn't I man?" he laughs off at the clumsy joke. Because there can't be a reason for not wanting to see him again, right? "Anyway, is what you got any good? I don't know what to get."

"Ebony? Ignis says it's hands down the best," the ravenette chuckles, taking a sip from his can.

"Who's Ignis?" 

Noctis almost chokes on his coffee. Seeing how he frowns, the freckled boy regrets having asked. How can a question that simple require such an effort? It takes him quite a lot to answer, but Prompto fakes he didn't notice; not everybody turns into a chatty mess when they're nervous. "He's- he's like an older brother to me, helping me out with stuff."

Prompto shrugs, finally tasting his drink. Whoever this Ignis is, he has a crappy taste for coffee, but at least the bitter beverage doesn't have any sugar in it. He can't really afford to ingest useless extra calories.


	2. Lucian History Class

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> History class makes Noctis remember a dark period of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** This chapter contains mentions of depression, self-harm and suicide attempt. The scene is only mildly graphic, but blood is still mentioned, so please be careful and keep yourself safe! If you want to skip the triggering topics, I will provide a short trigger-free summary in the end notes.  
>  ****  
>  _A guide to safe reading, or how to read this fiction avoiding the triggering sections_  
> 
> 
>   1. Read all the first block, from _"The Cosmogony is the oldest"_ to _"see you tomorrow"_.
>   2. Read the second block from _"Noctis regretted taking"_ to _"And he never asked for any of it, it's unfair"_.
>   3. Skip.
>   4. Read the texts at the end (they're easy to spot).
>   5. Read the summary at the end that covers the plot points you missed in the second block.
> 

> 
> **A message from the author:** As some of you guys might know, I received some extremely offensive anonymous hate mail for having abandoned a previous fiction. Unfortunately this affected me, forcing me to temporarily enable comments moderation to keep myself safe. But please don't stop leaving comments! Good and constructive feedback always makes my day better!<  
> My mood when writing worsened, but I have amazing friends who support me, so hopefully I'll feel better soon. Anyway, I already have some edited stuff, so I should be able to update this fiction as regularly as I planned. To be honest my biggest issue is that  
> I'm scared of receiving more hateful comments attacking me on a personal level when I publish new chapters.

**"The Cosmogony is the oldest** extant chronicle in Eos, narrating events happened roughly two millenia ago. Although many of the elements depicted easily fade into myth, part of occurrences might be considered for their historical value." Explains Professor Tacitus, his monotonous voice delivering the slightest hint of enthusiasm as he recites some passages from the book.

_"There once lived a man, born to a mortal but blessed with powers divine. Conjuring a collection of glaives he dispelled the darkness plaguing our star. As a reward for his efforts, the god granted him a holy Stone—the Crystal, which he was to guard at all costs, for it would one day choose a King to see us through the coming disaster and lead us to salvation."_

Prompto had never read the Cosmogony before, his family not being exactly the most religious, celebrating even Shiva's festivities merely for their commercial value. Nonetheless he's finding the topic of looking for the reality legends are built upon extremely intriguing. Six, some of the stuff the teacher is talking about sounds like something straight out of a videogame! On the other hand Noctis looks rather uninvolved by the topic, his expression somewhere between bored and outright annoyed. The blond wonders what he could be thinking about, as lost in his thoughts as he looks. He surely is an unusual person with that detached aura he gives while he sits alone, so different from the cute shyness of him interacting.

"If we start to analyze this paragraph we find at least two relevant details. First is the mention of the Crystal, which as a matter of fact exists and is guarded inside the Citadel. It is unsure whether it was truly gifted by the gods, however it is interesting that human kind went in its possessions two-thousands years ago. The second important detail is the reference to the Chosen King; as some of you may know, in year M.E. 741 the current heir to throne was indeed proclaimed to be the Chosen One. But we might examine that in the latter part of the course in which we will cover events of Contemporary Lucian History."

He hears Noctis snort, mumbling something like _bullshit_ under his breath. Prompto hoped he'd get to chat a little more, but except for the occasional grunt, the boy next to him never uttered a single word in the last hour. Is History that tiresome for him? He really hope so, otherwise it would mean that the ravenette just doesn't want to talk to him anymore; and that would suck. There's still so much King's Knight stuff to talk about. _Shit_. Maybe Noctis isn't that big of a nerd and the never-ending chatting somewhat annoyed him. Prompto's other passion is photography, but that's even more of an uncommon interest. Honestly, if it were for him he could even make conversation over the nutritional values of still water, so much of a chatter-box he is. Weather is also a good choice when you can't realy pick a topic, but he needs something more exciting. Maybe he should ask some personal questions - or maybe not. That would be uncomfortable. For how much he wants to get closer, Noctis is still pretty much complete stranger, and he has no right to dig into his privacy. Prompto pouts for a moment; he should start out by talking about himself, though he's pretty sure he'd be rather boring.

"Another valuable episode is the following." Professor Tacitus continues, scrolling through the pages of his well-worn copy of the Cosmogony, the cover almost completely faded due to years of thorough study. Prompto isn't listening anymore, his stomach a bit tight with tension. Noctis looks rather pissed right now, his pretty face staring at the teacher in a frown, his notebook still immaculate. The blond tries to relax, taking a deep breath; his jittery legs, restlessly bouncing up and down aren't of the same opinion, and he has to grip his knees to keep them somewhat steady. Noctis is so sulky because of the lesson and not because of him, he keeps repeating to himself. He swallows heavily; he should know by now that nobody wants to be his friend, and this black haired guys isn't going to be any different.

_"Before falling into eternal slumber, the Six bequeathed unto man one last treasure; a ring. Yet who among us was fit to possess this gift of the gods? After some time, the ring was transferred to the hands of a man blessed with powers divine, ultimately developing the mark identifying one fit to rule."_

Prompto glimpses at Noctis's unimpressed face once again, insecurity cluttering his mind. How could have been so naive to even hope that liking the same stupid videogame was enough to be able to befriend someone? He tries to focus on the lesson, but it's hard. He's kind of used to be alone after all, with even his parents always too busy to even acknowledge him. School have always being a nightmare, with classmates bullying him at first and pretending he didn't even exist later. He bites his lip, all he ever wanted was a friend, someone who would stay; and he's so desperate for it that all it took to lure him into thinking that he finally made it, was a few minutes of banter.

"Hence we have a mention of the Ring of the Lucii and the Founder King, Somnus, whose descendants would rule the Kingdom of Lucis up to this day. Again, it is uncertain whether the Ring was truly gifted by the gods, although it is undoubtable how it empowers the monarch, serving him as a means to channel the Crystal's magic."

The lesson just ended, Professor Tacitus left the obscure passage of 15:2 Nadir to read for homework and Noctis seems to have relaxed a bit. Prompto breathes out heavily; if he's gonna make a fool of himself, let be it.

"Are you okay man?" He asks, feeling stupid for how useless of a question that is. His hands are shaking stubbornly, urging him to grip on his copy of the Cosmogony in attempt to hide the agitation.

"Yeah, sorry," Noctis replies, rubbing at the back of his neck while clumsily trying to look away. He looks embarrassed, but that is understandable since the blond just asked the worst question possible. What are you supposed to say to a stranger asking that?

"What for?" He giggles. _Shit_ that was meant to be a joke but it didn't come out right, so he soon finds himself biting on his lip in worry, hands still holding on the Cosmogony as if his life depended on it.

"I don't know. I'm a bit tired I guessh" he explains, eyes fixed on the floor. At least he didn't sound pissed the blond thinks, still restlessly torturing his lip, the poor book now clutched so tight that his knuckles turned white. He start over thinking about the words; there was sadness in them.

"Was the lesson that boring?" Prompto continues, forcing a smirk on his now sore lips before he realizes that insisting on the subject is not the best of ideas. Why can't he ever keep his damn mouth shut. He glimpses at the cosmogony long agonizing in his hands and finally takes the decision to shove it back in his backpack, the not so elegant move giving him an hint on how to keep the conversation going. "I'm gonna grab some lunch now, you wanna come?" He quickly adds, grimacing a little as eating out isn't his favorite thing. But hey, you do what you gotta do to befriend people.

"I'm sorry, but I have my - um - fencing class this afternoon. Meaning I have to go now. Let's make it tomorrow, okay?" Again there's a hint of sadness in Noctis's voice, but that shy smile on his lips when he finished made him sound genuine. Next time. He stares at Prompto with a sheepish smile until he reaches for a pen to scribble down something on his notebook.

"Here's my number, so we can arrange for tomorrow," Noctis says, his cheeks adorned by an adorable pink blush when he hands off tiny piece of paper. Prompto feels his face burning as he reaches for the note, his fingers brushing against the ravenette's for a second. He has to swallow hard before he finally manages to shakily nod and chirp something supposed to sound something like _see you tomorrow_. 

  


**Noctis regretted taking** the Lucian History class the moment it started, Professor Tacitus almost uncovering his identity when he mentioned the Chosen King crap. If Noctis was the Chosen, then Eos would be doomed. How can a crippled Prince save the world - whatever that means anyway - when he can't even save his ass from being beaten by his Shield? The Gods really screwed up this time.

He turns the water to the hottest temperature, the burning sprays pleasantly scratching his sore body. Gladio totally thrashed him today, but he deserves every single bruise now adorning his delicate frame. He lets out a sigh, he is such a mess, he can't really blame Prompto if he decided to ditch him after today. For once he was lucky enough to find a nice guy to chat with in class and he managed to ruin everything. Shit, it was so mean of him to pretty much ignore the blond's babbling effort to break the ice. He swears he tried, he tried his best to be friendly and avoid unnecessary awkwardness, but he's just not good enough. He wanted to talk a little bit during History class, but the Professor's words made him so upset, damn it. The Crystal is sucking away his father's life and Tacitus talked about it as if it was some sort of privilege. He'd be glad to give this gift away, thank you very much. 

Noctis closes his eyes, tilting his head backwards to wash away the sweat drenching his raven hair. The hot shower is calming him a bit, but he can feel the cramped sickness of anxiety still weighting in his stomach. He inhales some slow deep breaths to get rid of the pressure crushing him, but he can't, his burden is too heavy. And he never asked for any of it, it's unfair.

Noctis's hands start wandering on his own thighs, fingers tracing the raised lines of the scars carved in his pale skin. He did them to himself. He's been clean for almost a year now, but some of the cuts are still red and gross. Eventually they'll fade into a pearl white though, like the older ones did. Not that he cares that much, not when there's that hideous plastic-like slash disfiguring his back, a reminder of that cursed night when the Marilith destroyed his life. Noctis shuts his eyes, burning tears running down his cheeks, his quiet sobs washed away in the soft noise of the pouring water. 

Noctis is unconsciously scratching at his scars now, but they give him no relief since they're healed, so he soon finds himself thinking about how it felt like to hurt himself; he shouldn't really be doing this, but he remembers the sharp sting of the razor blade on his skin and then the blood and the pain. It was hypnotizing to watch his own blood ooze from the gashes, the scarlet drops dripping down his thighs, staining his alabaster skin. What he used to crave the most was the the dull throb spreading from the wounds, even hours after he opened them; it's still clear in his mind how he could focus on it to get rid of the never ending ache in his heart. 

Since the incident the left him in a wheelchair, Noctis had to deal with chronic pain, affecting both his back and left knee; some days it was bearable, but others it would leave him breathless. Yet chronic pain isn't the only demon haunting him, he is broken inside, the disappointment of a prince he is. Not being able to express his feelings right, it took him a long time to realize how hard it was to feel anything at all; he used to feel so miserable and empty, until he discovered how a different kind pain could bring him some solace. The first time he cut himself it was by accident. He was fifteen, and his old injuries throbbed agonizingly that day, probably as a result of one of his first attempts at magic. While taking his usual shower after training the razor he was using to shave himself slipped from his fingers; his back was extremely stiff, so if it had fallen to the flood he wouldn't have been able to retrieve it. Hence, in the clumsy attempt of not letting it fall, the blade scraped across his thigh, breaking the skin. Noctis remembers how he stared at the crimson seeping from the scratch, he remembers how it made him feel still alive. It was short after that when he started hurting himself on purpose, maiming his skin in the vain attempt to dull the grief in his heart. Noctis soon became addicted, cutting deeper and deeper as the void inside of him grew. He felt ashamed of his actions, he was weak, a disgrace for the Lucis Caelum line; but being a failure also made him feel like he deserved to suffer, so he cut even deeper, venting his anger on his legs.

Eventually he cut too deep, the razor blade slicing through skin and muscle to expose his bare flesh. Noctis remembers how the gaping gash wouldn't stop bleeding, his panicked attempts to stop it useless as his blood kept leaking until it soaked towels red and dripped on the floor making a mess. He had been stuck on the cold bloods-smeared bathroom tiles for what it seemed hours when Ignis finally found him. He will never forget the despair in his advisor's eyes; Six, he will never forget how guilty he felt, a voice inside his head screaming how he was better off dead.

From Ignis discovering his secret Noctis obtained stitches and medication. He got prescribed with both painkillers for his chronic pain and antidepressants. He hated how the mix of the two messed with him, making him feel even more sleepy and tired than he normally was, dizzy and nauseous, unable to focus no matter how hard he tried. 

When you are a prince there is no room for being any less than perfect. Under the medication-induced tiredness Noctis had to double his efforts in school to keep his grades from declining, which summed up with daily sword training and political reports to read left him completely drained. He hated the feeling of being drugged up all the time, lost in a solitary shell of apathy and unable to enjoy anything at all. Eventually he stopped taking his antidepressants and relied on self-harm to cure himself again. Nobody noticed the change, as Noctis always managed to keep functional and hide his problems, but deep inside him the loneliness and suffering only increased. There was a time when he hoped he had never woken up from the coma he fell into after the Marilith attack; aside from his duties he would spend most of the day in bed, sleeping to run away from his dark thoughts. But that, unlike the side effects of his pills, at least was his own choice. 

The prince was terrified of Ignis discovering his self-harm again, so to avoid any suspicion instead of his thighs he started aiming the blade at his arms and chest, being careful to take a potion to heal up the damage when he messed up too badly. The voice inside his head kept screaming louder and louder; he was a burden and a dishonor for his family and friends, he had to make it all end for good.

He hardly remembers being rushed to the hospital, his wrists slit open. It happened a year ago.

The shower is running cold by now; Noctis takes a towel and hoists himself to sit on his wheelchair. He feels slightly better after crying, it helps him let the pressure out. He quickly dresses himself in his pajamas and heads to the kitchen; it's almost 7.00PM and Ignis could arrive any moment now. He stops by the kitchen counter and reaches for a small container, popping out a pill and swallowing it without any water. He's been taking his medication everyday since his suicide attempt, and he goes to therapy once a week. He's not as tired as he used to be since, in agreement with his doctor, he decided to avoid taking the painkillers at all unless his pains became unbearable. He still gets sleepy sometimes but it's manageable, he can focus enough to study, play videogames and live his life; a life he couldn't have even imagined a year ago. Surely he's still scared - no, he is terrified - about his future, the thought of taking his responsibility over a Kingdom that deserves a leader far better than him suffocating him. He feels as if he had a noose around his neck, getting tighter as time passes by, waiting to finally choke him the day his father dies. But at least now he found the strength to accept it in a way; he is going to live that future, doing his best not to be too much of a shame to his ancestors.

Some days are worse that others but even after a bad day small things have the power to make everything okay. Noctis smiles shyly as he sees a notification on his phone; he never had someone text him before, Ignis and Gladio being the only exception.

ChocoBoi_36

**Today** 06:47 PM

  
 **ChocoBoi_36:** Hey man, here's Prompto

**ChocoBoi_36:** Wanna hang out before class tomorrow?

**NoctGar:** Hey! yeah sure

**NoctGar:** Where u wanna go?

**ChocoBoi_36:** Yay!

**ChocoBoi_36:** There's a Square Enix café

**ChocoBoi_36:** Near Uinsomnia

**NoctGar:** The one next to the UNIQLO building?

**ChocoBoi_36:** Yup

**ChocoBoi_36:** Meet you there at 8.30?

**NoctGar:** Sounds good

**NoctGar:** See u tomorrow

**ChocoBoi_36:** See you tomorrow dude

Now Noctis has good reason to wake up early the next morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Trigger-free summary:** Noctis struggles with chronic pain and depression. While taking a shower after a stressful day, his mind wanders off to recall a dark period of his life. The pressure of being a prince is high, and he developed some bad coping mechanisms; the wrong medication made it worse, but instead of seeking help and discussing the problem with his doctor he closed into himlself and made some stupid decisions. Things got worse and worse from there, until he gave up. Eventually he got the help he needed, and thanks to weekly therapy and the right medication he's gotten better, living a normal life.


	3. Square Enix Cafe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis and Prompto have breakfast together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** This chapter contains mentions of an eating disorder. It's not graphic, but please keep yourself on the safe side while reading! You can find a trigger-free summary in the end notes.
> 
>  
> 
> _A guide to safe reading, or how to read this fiction avoiding the triggering sections_
> 
>   1. Read the first block, from _"Noctis takes another drag"_ to _"all the way here"_.
>   2. Read the second block, from _The café is small"_ to _"all of it"_. 
>   3. Skip the third block, from _"Prompto used to be"._
>   4. Read the fourth block, from _"Noctis ponders whether"_ to _"is so rad"_. 
>   5. Read the fifth block, from _"It was so fun"_ to the end.
> 


**Noctis takes another drag** from his cigarette, savoring the feeling of his head being pleasantly light. Ignis insisted on waiting with him until Prompto's arrival, but the boy stubbornly refused, terrified that the blond would grasp that something is wrong with him. _Wrong_. Yeah, because being the Crown Prince of fucking Lucis feels wrong and unfair since it had brought him only pain and sadness.

Actually Noctis had needed to discuss a little with his advisor to be allowed to go out with Prompto. Ignis kept repeating that it wasn't safe and that he should at least have him checked out by security before. Such bullshit; Noctis would see the blond in class in any case, so how was that any different? He knows he isn't an expert at wandering around Insomnia, but having breakfast didn't involve any of that either since Ignis would just drop him in front of the place. Which is also literally a couple hundred feet away from UInsomnia's campus.

Noctis hates being treated like a child, as if he couldn't take care of himself at all. He got so angry during their argument he wanted to scream at Ignis. It got to the point that he almost confessed him how he regularly sneaks out of his apartment at night to buy booze and cigarettes at the convenience store nearby. Although he's glad he managed to keep his mouth shut just in time, or he probably wouldn't be waiting for the blond in front of the _Square Enix café_ now.

Noctis nervously checks his phone. It's 8.35 and Prompto still hasn't shown up. He swallows hard, anxiety building up as he taps on the screen begging for a notification that isn't coming. Unsure whether he should send a message he starts typing, then he deletes everything, shoving his phone back inside his pocket and replacing it with his packet of Coeurl Blue. He fidgets with the cigarette between his fingers for a few moments before bringing it to his slightly chapped lips to light it up. Noctis closes his eyes as smoke fills his lungs, a sickly dizziness spreading through his body. He knows he shouldn't be smoking this much, but it feels so good when nicotine helps him to feel nothing at all. And now he needs it.

He sighs, 8.40 and there's still no trace of the blond. He unlocks his libraphone's screen with a shaky hand before quickly locking it again to put it away. How could have he been so naive to believe his classmate would actually want to see him again? He should be used of people taking advantage of him, he should have learned not to care. But damn if it doesn't still hurt.

8.45 and Noctis starts wondering why he's still waiting, when deep inside his heart he knows Prompto's just not coming. He bites on his already sore lip, taking a deep breath to find the courage to stay a bit longer. As long as he keeps waiting he can pretend everything is okay and the blond didn't make a fool of him. People can be late sometimes, right?

8.50 and the prince can't keep calm anymore, steering his wheelchair back and forth seeking for relief. Fuck, he should have known this was going to happen, the daemon of self loathing growing stronger inside of him. He's not good enough and he's never going to be. He'll feel bad the whole day if Prompto doesn't show up, and the thought of having to keep it hidden from Ignis pretending everything is okay makes him sick. Geez, no matter what, his retainer must not discover this or he'll have to face a pretty nasty lecture about trusting strangers.

"Noctis!" A distressed voice shakes the Prince out of his disheartening thoughts, making him lift his sad eyes to meet a sweaty smiling face. Oh, Prompto didn't ditch him after all!

"I'm so sorry dude," he pants in apology. His back is slightly hunched, hands resting on his hips, gasping for air. "The train was crazy late, so I decided to come on foot, but then I got lost and I -" he stops to swallow thickly before taking a couple of deep breaths. "I know I'm late - please forgive me."

Noctis smiles shyly, unable to speak for a moment. "It's okay, of course I forgive you," he mumbles, clumsily rubbing at the back of his neck to distract himself from the bright blush blossoming on his cheeks. He isn't always one to give second chances, but the blond looks like he ran all the way there, making it obvious that he truly cared about seeing him.

"Thank you. You never replied to my text so I was afraid you got pissed and left."

"Wait, you sent me a message?" Noctis asks in surprise, swiftly checking his libraphone for a notification. Nothing.

"Shit. I didn't send it," Prompto mutters, staring in horror at the unsent draft on his screen. "I'm such a mess, I'm sorry."

"Don't worry, it happens," the prince reassures him, just happy that he showed up at all. "Your stamina's amazing if your ran all the way here."

  


**The café is small** and definitely looks more cozy than classy, with small brass tables messily packed around the room and a variety of mismatched cushy chairs to choose from. A warm sweet scent of coffee and freshly baked pastries lingers in the air and soft piano music is playing in the background, making the overall vibe even more intimate. It feels like being in Altissia, Prompto thinks, nestling himself in a stuffed chair by a partially hidden table at the furthest corner from the entrance. Not that he's ever been to the Accordian capital, but he's a hopeless romantic who daydreamed of visiting it with someone special a thousand times. Noctis just shifts himself from his wheelchair to a snug couch covered in an obnoxious floral print fabric, and the blond can't help but wonder why he did it when staying on his wheelchair would be far more practical. Probably the all those pillows look too comfy for him to pass, he decides.

"Everything looks so good," Noctis comments after having thoroughly analyzed the menu without uttering a single word for a good couple of minutes. Prompto can't really blame him, since Square Enix's pastries are really to die for. He usually wouldn't have any of it, but since his stupid ass got lost adding a good 5 miles to his morning exercise routine he can treat himself with some delicacy. 

"Yeah man, it's hard to choose," the blond chuckles, "but I think I'll get the Kupoberry cheesecake and some coffee." 

"I'll have the same then," Noctis replies, closing the menu and staring at the waitress to catch her attention. Geez, this guy is even worse than him at social stuff, but Prompto doesn't feel like loudly calling the attendant either so he just let him do it his way. Surprisingly his method works quite well, the waitress steadily walking towards their table.

"Good morning, do you need any recommendation?" she asks, softly smiling at the two boys. Her accent sounds a bit fake, which is kind of the norm for places like Square, but as long as the stuff is good it doesn't really matter.

"No we're good," Noctis hesitates, peeking in the blond's direction as if he needed some assent. Prompto nods, and to his surprise Noctis places the order for the both of them. The black haired guy lowers his eyes when he speaks, but his voice doesn't stutter. Maybe he's not as dramatically shy as he first thought.

It doesn't take long for the waitress to deliver the orders, placing on the table a carved wooden tray holding two cups and two deliciously looking slices of creamy cheesecake topped with Kupoberry sauce and some juicy Ulwaat berries. Noctis doesn't wait a second before digging into his cake, the velvety texture melting under the pressure of his fork. His eyes widen in delight as he tastes it, making Prompto feel gratified that he likes what he recommended. There's a bit of sauce on his lip and he looks so cute that the blond's unsure whether he should warn him right away or enjoy the sight a little longer. He almost pouts when Noctis licks away the dressing, taking a sip from his unsweetened coffee to hide a slight blush.

"This cake is just so good," the ravenette mumbles, his mouth still half full, before staring in astonishment at his friend's barely touched plate.

"Yeah, it's so yummy! Too bad the run kind of killed my hunger," Prompto nervously laughs, clutching the cup in his hands. He chugs down some more coffee, praying that it'll keep his stomach from grumbling. He's actually pretty hungry after all the exercise, but the high calorie content of the cheesecake is making him anxious, so he'd rather just not eat all of it.

  


**Prompto used to be** a fat child. His parents, both company employees far more concerned with their careers than with their child, used to leave the house for work in the early morning and their hectic schedule often brought them back home only after Prompto's bedtime. In that climate of solitude food became soon the boy's only comfort. Partially as a way to spoil him and make up for his parent's absence, but mostly so they didn't have to bother cooking and feeding him properly, he was allowed to eat whatever he wanted. It's not surprising that he gained weight, stuffing his face with fast-food and candy to try too fill up the void of loneliness.

Just like at home the kid was also alone at school, always ignored by his classmates as if he were invisible. Then, when he was fourteen, things got worse; some boys in his class started bullying him, making fun of him because of his weight. It's at that point that he started to wish he'd truly be invisible and disappear.

It wasn't difficult for him to change; from comfort food just became a dread. He started his diet with cutting off portions, then he began exercising. He would weight himself every morning and take daily pictures to monitor his progress. But at some point that wasn't enough anymore, so he started counting calories, obsessing on how much he'd be able to burn while exercising.

At fifteen Prompto had gotten rid of all of his extra weight, but none of his problems. Nobody bullied him for his weight anymore, they'd just mock him because of his freckles or called him _chocobutt_ instead. He kept restricting his diet and exercising, and by sixteen he was stick thin and one of the best athletes of his high school's long-distance running team; but that, again, wasn't enough.

At seventeen Prompto reached his lowest. He was severely underweight, which among other unpleasant side effects like constant dizziness made his sports performance decline. Eventually he fainted while training with the school's team and was rushed to the infirmary. Man, he denied having a problem at first; he lied and lied, told that he had only forgotten to eat breakfast and that he was okay, but luckily his coach didn't buy it. The guy, a former Crownsguard who trained kids as hobby, always had a sweet spot for Prompto, and patiently waited for the boy to spit it out. It was hard to admit he had a problem, part of him kept refusing the truth. In his mind eating disorders were only a girls thing; so how could him, Prompto, undeniably a boy, suffer from it? Finally he fainted on the tracks again, and with the threat of being kicked out of the team he confessed everything. He cried while he told his coach what he did to himself, from restricting his calorie intake to fasting. With the promise of remaining in the running team he assented seeing a doctor, who diagnosed him with anorexia and got him into weekly therapy.

Prompto's been on recovery for almost a year now; he's still underweight and he has a long way to go, but he's improving. He managed to get into University thanks to his running times - his high school instructor helped him a tiny bit there - and now that he even has a friend things can only get better.

  


**Noctis ponders whether** he should drink his coffee unsweetened like the blond does, but he almost chokes on his first sip, making the other laugh.

"Eugh it's bitter," he complains, making a face before adding three generous spoonfuls of sugar.

"Dude, will that much sugar even dissolve," Prompto chuckles.

"Sure it will," the prince smirks, stirring in another spoonful as if accepting challenges and prove others wrong were his favorite activity in life.

"It's even better than Ebony now," he casually states after tasting his now overly sweetened coffee, making the blond snort in the cutest way.

"It's a crime wasting that cake," Noctis mutters, eyes fixed on the jam-coated piece waiting on the other boy's abandoned fork.

"Wanna help me finish it?" Prompto giggles, offering the plate with a smile.

"Really? Are you sure?" Noctis says, staring with wide eyes at the cake; when Ignis's around he never gets to eat two slices. 

"Wait, you were serious? How can you even fit all of that into your stomach, and also stay skinny! Its' unfair! Please tell me your secret dude," the blond teases with a grin, his freckles half hidden by a crimson flush.

"You're one to talk! Geez, Gladio at least is big enough to call me scrawny," he protests, his delicate features turning into the prettiest little frown. Prompto's actually visibly thinner than him, but he doesn't pay much attention to it; it's not like he truly has much muscle or anything on him either.

"I know, just kidding. Who's Gladio anyway?" Prompto snickers, a wide smile on his lips assuring his mocks aren't serious.

"He's my -" Noctis stops a few seconds before answering, biting on his lips as he thinks, "um, fencing instructor. He tells me I'm a scrawny brat all the time." Prompto burst into laughter at his confession, the image of a grumpy Noctis waving around a blade too clear to ignore.

"Yeah, you told me you fence, that's cool. Didn't think you were the type though. Even more so given your teacher sounds like he's a dick," he shrugs, unable to shut his mouth for a second. This guy truly talks a lot and he's a bit blunt, but it's no big deal since he also sounds kind and sincere. The prince really doesn't mind, and to be completely honest he's glad his new friend is kind of a chatter-box talking enough for two.

"Why shouldn't I be the type?" Noctis questions, a baffled expression on his face.

"Don't know, you look more like someone who'd just stay at home and play videogames," he explains with shy a smile.

"If it was for me I'd rather just do that. But I kind of _have to_ learn how to handle a swords," Noctis reveals apathetic, somewhat resigned not to have much of a say in his life.

"I see. But fighting with a sword like Ray Jack is so rad."

  


**"It was so fun** to have breakfast with you, I'd love do it again," Prompto says shyly, the soft freckles on his cheeks embellished by the slightest hint of pink.

"Yeah, me too," replies Noctis, fidgeting at his unruly hair. He's never had a friend before, not one who wasn't on his payroll at least. Of course he knows both Ignis and Gladio do care for him, but he can't get rid of the disheartening feeling lingering at the back of his head that they wouldn't be sticking around if it wasn't their job. _Damn_ , why is this blond guy hanging out with him in the first place he still wonders. He's a shy mess, he's not good at talking and the only thing he's good at is being a burden to others. Shit, what if Prompto's just pitying him as the sad miserable disabled guy with no friends he is. Or maybe he does know he's the Prince and he has some insidious reason to get to know him.

Noctis got lost in his depressing thoughts for a bit too long, given the concern evident in the blond's tone as he finally speaks, "dude, are you okay?"

It takes him a few seconds to focus and articulate an answer, the crippling thought of having disappointed Prompto feeding his insecurities once more.

"Yeah, just - I wonder, are we friends?" _Fuck_ , he should have kept his mouth shut, all he is capable of is making everything awkward and ruining things when he talks.

"Um, I guess so? Unless you find me annoying because I talk way too much and I'm an idiot for not having figured it out sooner," his voice almost cracks at the end of the sentence, making anxiety painfully sink into Noctis's stomach. He needs to fix this, why does he always have to be so inadequate?

"Hey no, I do want to be your friend! It's just nobody ever wanted to be my friend before," he explains, the weight on his stomach growing heavier as he speaks. _Six_ , he feels like he's about to throw up but he bites on his lip and reaches for the blond's hand, gently holding it. His skin's cold, but it's also so smooth. He's almost afraid of scratching him with his fingers, callous from years of sword training and steering himself around in his wheelchair. His touch seems to have eased the blond a bit since a cute sheepish smile is now on his freckly face.

"I can't believe that, why would anyone not want to be your friend?" the blond asks, returning a soft squeeze to his gloved hand.

"It's because of who I am, I guess," Noctis sighs, the confession taking up all the courage left in him. This isn't how he had planned to disclose his identity. 

"Because you're kind of a nerd?" Prompto interrupts him bluntly, making his eyes widen and his cheeks burn red.

"Maybe? Do I look like I'm a nerd?" the prince shyly inquires, eyes fixed on his empty coffee cup; he sighs, there's some sugar piled at the bottom.

"Well, kind of," the blond mutters, burying his fidgety hands in his lap, "I mean, you're wearing a limited edition Roen X King's Knight T-shirt, so you must be some kind of a rich nerd".

Fuck, Gladio wasn't lying all the times he called him a spoiled brat. Noctis feels sick; not only he looks like he's living off daddy, but he also looks dumb for having shed more than he should have on that stupid T-shirt. He sinks deeper into his puffy cushion trying to disappear from Prompto's sight. Times like this he wishes his magic powers included invisibility.

"I'm sorry," Prompto apologizes, restlessly jittering on his seat.

"Um okay," Noctis swallows hard, clenching his hands around his thighs to distract himself. It's not as effective as when he used to hurt himself, but he still can't get rid of the habit. He could have never imagined that being recognized as a rich kid would make him feel so bad. Not even being recognized as the prince causes him so much angst.

"I didn't mean to hurt your. Sometimes I just don't know when to keep my stupid mouth shut," Prompto apologizes, giving Noctis a faint smile.

"No it's just - I never thought I _looked_ rich," he admits, slowly loosening the grip on his now-aching thighs. Ignis always tells him he's too sloppy in his casual clothes, scolding him for not putting enough effort into his appearance. Which isn't even true since styling his hair takes a good 15 minutes and a considerable amount of hairspray. But how come he looks rich now when just this morning Ignis upturned his nose at the sight of his, quote, _hobo-angler jacket_. They had quarreled a bit until Noctis gave up wearing it and chose one he thought to be a subtle King's Knight one instead. He shouldn't have given in to his retainer dammit.

"Listen, I don't care about your bank account and we don't have to talk about this if it makes you uncomfortable okay?" the blond reassure him. Noctis feels relieved that he doesn't have to deal with the topic now, but he's also aware that putting it off will cause him more trouble in the end. Geez, he's never going to be ready to talk about his title.

"Lesson is in ten minutes, we should go," Noctis hints, reaching for his wheelchair. He exhales when he lowers himself on the seat, already missing being _normal_. That's why he sits on regular chairs every chance he gets, because then people don't see him as the _disabled_ guy anymore. It doesn't last long, but the feeling is too good for him to pass up.

"Wait, what are you doing," Noctis complains as he sees his classmate reach for his wallet, "it's my turn to pay."

"Nope, you are my guest and I also arrived late so I have to make up for it," Prompto states, grinning while he blocks his way.

"You don't have to, really," he insists, confused by the blond's sudden behavior. But the mischievous look on his face makes him understand his reasons. "Prompto, I don't need to be in debt to want to hang out again, you know."

"So you can see yourself it's no trouble if you pay next time man," he giggles, finally paying for breakfast.

"Okay, when?"

"It's up to you to invite me now, Noct."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Trigger-free summary:** Prompto used to be a chubby child, but he's not anymore; he suffers from an eating disorder since he was fourteen, but he's been recovering for the past year. He goes to therapy once a week and now that he has a friend things will only improve!


	4. Unexpected Encounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being late for class can cause trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** none.  
>  **A note from the author:** I want to than all of the nice people who are following and linking this work: thank you so much!
> 
> Since it fits better with my work schedule, from this week on I'll update the fiction on Friday.

**The alarm has been** beeping for a solid five minutes when Noctis finally finds the strength to turn it off and open his eyes. It's 7.30AM and it's far too early for him to be awake, but he somehow brings himself to rub his sleepy face and sluggishly sit up. He's seeing Prompto in an hour, meaning he has to get ready. During the last month it has become a habit for the two of them to meet for breakfast at _Square Enix café_ before class and the prospect of spending some time together is enough for the ravenette to get up without needing Ignis to yell at him. So he slowly drags himself to the edge of the bed, carefully helping his legs slip off the mattress until his feet press against the cold polished floor.

He shivers at the sensation. It's so ironical how the nerves in his legs function well enough to allow him to _feel_ things, but not well enough for him to control their movement. When he made it out alive from the daemon attack when he was eight people said it was a miracle, but he knows it wasn't. He survived only because his father restlessly cast heal spells on him. Spells that weren't strong enough to repair all the damage, leaving him with major scarring on his back and barely sensitive lower limbs. 

Some nights he still wakes up in sweat from nightmares about the incident, but it's mostly flashes as his memories of that cursed day are quite foggy. All he can distinctly remember is a sudden sharp pain and a pool of blood, both his nanny's and his own. After that it all became dark and the next blurred image is one of his father at his bedside, holding his hand and reading him stories. 

What he still remembers clearly however is the day he was told he could never walk again.

It was Ignis who actually told him. King Regis hadn't shown up in a while and Noctis complained about it to his ten years old advisor. He asked him when his dad would come play with the ball with him again and the poor boy, who couldn't actually bring himself to lie to him, spilled the truth. It would never happen again. It's indelible on Noctis's heart how he didn't cry when he was told; he simply apathetically shrugged pretending he didn't care and said that he was tired and wanted to sleep anyway. What the Marilith didn't break, that day did.

A few months later he accidentally overheard a conversation between his father and Drautos. It's unforgettable how his dad sounded regretful and torn by anguish; he never heard that tone ever again. The king said something about the military aggression of Tenebrae, which cost the life of Queen Sylva. Apparently the Oracle's healing powers were strong enough that she could have guaranteed Noctis a full recovery. But the Prince's fate was doomed so she died by Glauca's hand a month before he got injured. King Regis could have sent the Kingsglaive to Tenebrae to prevent the invasion but he didn't, afraid to leave Lucian borders exposed. Quite ironically the Empire still breached into Lucian territory soon after, and even managed to ambush no less than the Crown Prince. Once again at the time Noctis couldn't bring himself to react to what he heard; he just slept as much as he could not to think about it. It was only years later that he started over-thinking about the matter, letting himself get consumed by the thought of how his life would have turned out to be if he could still walk.

Noctis takes a deep breath before reaching out to his wheelchair and sighs as he steers himself towards the bathroom, a bit upset that he can't have a bedside carpet anymore because the wheels would get caught on it. He knows it's a stupid little thing to complain about, but having to face the cold floor every morning affects his already precarious mood. He sighs again, at least it's not as unfathomably icy as the polished marble in his old room at the Citadel.

He moved out of the royal palace to live at his own place when he was fifteen. He hated it there; despite always being surrounded by people he felt excruciatingly alone. Nobody would ever talk to him and most servants used to treat him like some kind of fragile piece of furniture to move around; to be honest the few who weren't afraid to _handle_ him were the worst, as they were those who deemed him unworthy to be the heir of the kingdom and snickered at his back. He knows he could have told his dad about their behavior and it would've stopped, but he just didn't. _Geez_ , be it because of royal duties or whatever, but his father never had time to spend with him, so no way he was using the little he had to be a whiny baby and make him worry. A part of him was sure Regis loved him, but given how rarely they got to see each other despite living on the same floor he had the doubt that he was avoiding him voluntarily. _Shit_ , no matter how hard he tried to pretend he didn't care, in the end the truth was that he missed his dad and being neglected hurt so much. They used to be way closer before the incident that left him in a wheelchair, so even if he did his best not to think about it, there where times when Noctis was pretty sure his dad was simply ashamed of having a son like him, useless and weak.

After he enters the bathroom Noctis messily tosses his Assassin's Creed pajamas to the floor tiles and enters the shower, gripping on the handles attached to the wall to hoist himself to the little seat. Then he lazily starts scrubbing his body and hair under the hot water sprays with some sweet earthy smelling soap, enjoying the warmth for a few minutes. He doesn't feel like leaving his steamy heaven, but eventually he grabs a towel and dries himself quickly before putting on a pair of black briefs and socks. It's now time to take care of his silky hair and he's quite meticulous about it: he first blow dries it to give it some volume, then he straightens it with a flat iron and finally he styles the spikes and sets the bangs in place with a generous amount of hair spray. At last, before leaving the bathroom, he washes his teeth with some spearmint flavored toothpaste and wears a couple of drops of amber scented cologne matching his body wash.

All the time he spends styling his hair is compensated by how quickly he chooses his clothes, almost picking the first things he finds in his wardrobe. Today, alongside a pair of jeans, to complete his usual casual attire he's going for his limited edition Justice Monsters Five T-shirt, the one that came with the collector's edition box-set he got his hands on thanks to Ignis contacting the company on his behalf. Prompto already discovered his passion for overpriced videogame merchandise, so he doesn't even have to worry about that anymore. Last thing before leaving he adjusts the brace on his left knee, wears a pair of not-so-useful sneakers and swallows his morning pills with some Phoenix Purple canned orange juice.

While Ignis drives him to University Noctis usually takes a short nap, but today he watches Insomnia pass by, the streets busy with cars during rush hour. The sight is amazingly pretty he must admit, the kaleidoscope of flashy lights reflecting on the glass skyscrapers, and the marvellous glistening of the magic barrier up in the sky taking his breath away despite him being born and raised in the city. 

The car stops at yet another traffic light and Noctis worries he's going to run late. Of course he knows Prompto's not going to get mad at him since it's not his fault, but he's pissed that he's getting robbed of some precious time they could spend together. As of lately he's been craving for his friend's company more and more, and after talking to Ignis he's decided that he'll invite him to his place the next weekend. He even agreed to help Ignis clean the apartment to be allowed to invite the blond, but he's sure that this extreme sacrifice of his will be worth it.

 _Geez_ , he's so nervous at the thought of asking him to come over that his hands are all sweaty. Even more so since the ravenette's also resolute to reveal his royal origins; his stomach hurts and makes him nauseous as if he had eaten rocks for breakfast. It's kind of shitty of him that after a month he hasn't told yet the small detail that he's royalty, he knows that. At first he couldn't bring himself to do it because he didn't know Prompto well enough, but now he's just terrified of his reaction; he surely knows how painful lies can be. _Shit_ , why does he always has to be like this, avoiding things just to make everything worse. Anxiety is chewing at him but he can't really put it off longer so this weekend he's going to spill the truth, no matter how many cigarettes he'll need to smoke not to go insane. Dammit if he isn't afraid that Prompto won't look at him the same way after knowing who he is; not everybody in Insomnia is fond of the Lucis Caelum line. What if this all ends up with the blond not wanting to be his friends anymore? If he had told him sooner at least he wouldn't have got attached. He swallows hard, his throat achingly dry; there's not much he can do to fix things now apart from confessing his little secret. In a month he's just lucky his new friend didn't discover it from somebody else. 

  


**During the past month** Noctis got the habit of smoking one last cigarette right in front of _Square Enix café_ before the lesson starts. Today Prompto and him are terribly late since breakfast took a bit longer than usual, but despite Noctis telling him to hurry to class the blond decides to stay. His history class began 15 minutes ago so showing up even later isn't going to make a difference, as in any case he couldn't get a grasp on it if his life depended on it. The blond doesn't smoke himself, mostly because it would badly affect his sports performance, but he kind of enjoys watching Noctis do it. He likes the way he holds the filter between his slender fingers, casually dragging it to his shapely lips to take deep drags. And Gods if the ravenette isn't cute when he smirks while he breaths out the thick clouds of smoke.

Noctis has almost finished his cigarette when a silver haired man in overly trendy clothes approaches the two boys.

"What a shame if you were skipping class, right, Prince Noctis? Name's Dino, by the way. Pleasure," says the sketchy guy, eyes fixed on Noctis who stares back blankly. The blond's unsure of what he just heard; he didn't like the mocking tone of this dude and the fact that he called Noctis by name's creepy enough to make his stomach churn. 

"The Crown Prince of Lucis, smoking instead of going to school. Surely you didn't think it'd go unnoticed - at least not at the eyes of a reporter?"

 _Crown Prince_. Those words light up a bulb at the back of Prompto's brain; it would actually make sense if Noctis was the Prince. He's rich, mostly dressed in black Roen clothes and that guy called Ignis he sometimes talks about could easily be his butler. Gods, the ravenette even said that he fences! At the Lucian History class the professor mentioned how the Lucis Caelum family wields magic weapons. But there must be some kind of misunderstanding because if he really is the Prince why on Eos did he keep it hidden all this time? Noctis would tell him something like that; the two of them have been regularly hanging out together for a full month now; Noctis is a _friend_.

The blond looks at Noctis; he's visibly pale and his hands are balled tightly into fists. _Shit,_ something's seriously wrong.

"What do you want?" Noctis asks, visibly trying his best to keep his composure. His deep voice does sounds almost impassive, but the way his lip trembles betrays how inside he's not calm at all.

"Oh, nothing. I just wanted to make sure our future Kings gets the education a ruler needs," the shady reporter smirks. 

"Noct, what's going on?" Prompto hesitantly asks, looking alternatively at his friend and at the reporter.

"N-nothing," Noctis stutters, looking even paler as he grips on his chair for dear life.

"Did I interrupt a date? That would make an even better scoop," Dino laughs, glancing unapologetically at the two boys.

Prompto stares back at him unable to speak, this is all crazy. His legs are going jelly; as if discovering Noctis's title wasn't shocking enough he's even being blackmailed now, this Dino guy implying the two of them are dating. Which is totally not the case, Noctis and him are totally just friends. Sure, he's cute and he's a nice and fun person to be around once you get to know him, but there's nothing romantic in their relationship.

"Write what you want about me but leave him alone, please," Noctis's voice's trembling and he can't keep his eyes off the floor. _Fuck_. The blond's so scared, he never had to deal with paparazzi before and he's completely unprepared, unable to bring himself to react.

"I won't publish anything if you toss that cigarette and go to class, boy," Dino says, turning on his heels and walking away.

Prompto stares at the man until he's out of sight, then looks at Noctis. He's visibly shaken and his midnight blue eyes look suspiciously wet under his messy bangs.

"So was that true? You're the Prince?" he asks sadly, just realizing how hurt he feels. It's not the truth itself that is hard to stomach, it's that it stings how Noctis didn't trust him enough to tell who he really is. He's so hurt he can't look at his face, yet he can clearly picture him nod and then bite on his lip the way he does when he has a hard time answering a question.

"I'm sorry I ruined everything," the prince apologizes, his voice almost cracking.

 _Shit_ , his words cut like a knife. He was his friend, Prompto's only friend. Or at leasthe thought so before being acknowledged by a stranger that he lied to him and that he possibly knows nothing about him.

"Would you have ever told me?" he asks hesitantly, unsure whether he truly wants to know the answer. This is so painful he can't breathe, but the guilt in Noctis's eyes breaks his heart even more. He can see how the ravenette's holding back tears, making the task of holding back his even harder.

"I - I wanted to tell you, I swear," he mumbles. After a month of lies the blond doesn't know whether to believe him, afraid to suffer more. 

"Okay," he replies after long moments of silence, "I'm sure we can fix this. I'm not angry or anything, just, give me some time, okay?"

He doesn't watch the prince go away, as he already needs all of his willpower to fight the urge to cry.

Prompto feels like he's being much of hypocrite at being so mad when he's keeping a secret from Noctis as well, but his possibly isn't nearly as big. Yes, he has that mysterious barcode tattooed on his wrist that he always hides, but he doesn't know anything about it either so what's there to reveal? His parents adopted him, he knows that much, but when he asked them about it they didn't have any answer. All they knew is that he came from Niflheim and that he was one year old when he became part of the Argentum family.

  


**Prompto's finally at his seat** , merely one hour late for class and Noctis is nowhere to be seen. He never missed a lesson before and his absence feels strange; it hurts. Of course he didn't expect him to sit right next to him as if nothing had happened, but the fact that he's outright skipping class worries him. Probably he just needs to be alone for a while the blond tries to convince himself, yet the weight on his stomach doesn't agree. Something's wrong. He reaches for his libraphone and types a message, then deletes it, staring at the screen for minutes, the History lesson completely forgotten. He bites his lip and brings himself to type something neutral: _Are you coming to class?_ Maybe a bit too neutral because after half an hour Noctis hasn't replied yet, when usually it would only take him a couple of minutes. He must be pissed at him, Prompto grimaces; after all he told his friend to give him some time when being left alone was the last thing he needed. _Fuck_ , how could have he been so insensitive. Noctis had been threatened by a stranger and his first reaction was to get pissed because of the bitter news; he's such a shitty friend, the ravenette deserves better than a heartless, selfish jerk who leaves him when he most needs support.

Tears start welling up in Prompto's bright blue eyes, but he fights them away; he can still fix things up.

The History lesson just ended and the blond's notebook lays immaculate, even more than usual as for once it's devoid of lazily sketched out chocobos. He still hasn't heard from Noctis so he tries sending him another text: _Noct I'm sorry. You have all the right to be mad at me but please, just let me know you're okay._ He takes a deep breath, he misses him.

  


**Noctis is scared** ; it hurts so bad and there's so much blood. _Shit_ , he has truly fucked up this time.


	5. A Prince Should Never Cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally at home, Noctis gets in trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** this chapter contains descriptions of blood and injury; it's not too graphic, but please keep yourself on the safe side. There are also mentions of past self-harm and past suicide attempt.
> 
> _A guide to safe reading, or how to read this fiction avoiding the triggering sections_
> 
>   1. Read the first block, from _"Life has never been"_ to "break down and make a mess"
>   2. Skip the second block, from _"He doesn't know how"_ to _"dials the blond's number"_.
>   3. Read the third block, from _"Noctis are you okay?"_ to _send me your address okay?"_.
>   4. Read the fourth block, from _"Prompto feels like his heart's" to _"Bathroom cabinet"_ (then skip the rest of the bock if the process dressing a wound makes you uncomfortable)._
> _
>   5. Read the fifth block, from _"If there's one type"_ to the end. 
>   6. Read the trigger-free summary in the end notes.
> _ 

> 
> __
> 
>  
> 
> __
> 
>  
> 
> **A message from the author:** unfortunately, due to the next chapters being unfinished and my full-time job keeping me extremely busy, from now on I'll be able to upload a new chapter only every other week. Updates will remain scheduled for Friday. I apologize for the inconvenience and I hope you guys will stick with me until this fiction is finished!
> 
>  
> 
> __

**Life has never been** kind to Noctis, and just as usual misfortune struck him again the very moment things seemed to turn for the better. This one time he can only blame himself for what happened though. If only he had had the spirit to tell Prompto about his identity at the right time things would have been different, but he's a coward who always runs away from his problems.

When Dino addressed him by his title he felt as if the whole world crashed on him, shattered in a million pieces. For the first time in his life he had plans for the future, he had something to look forward; for the first time in his life he had a friend. And it's all Noctis's fault if a shady reporter took it away from him. He should have told the truth about his heritage earlier; dammit he even had the chance to do it when Prompto awkwardly recognized him as a rich kid, but he was too scared. He's always too scared, the failure of a Prince he is. He's weak and worthless and he couldn't even bring himself to fight back the journalist. Gladio would be so disappointed at him if he knew; he's only good at being a cheeky brat when it comes to slacking off training or refusing to eat his vegetables, completely unable stand his ground when he actually should. He just stared back at Dino paralyzed and speechless, with his throat dry and vocal chords unwilling to move so that all he could say were a few stuttered words. He almost begged out of fear; he's so ashamed of himself.

As soon as he enters his apartment Noctis finally bursts into tears. Tears that had been cluttering his eyelashes to the point that the whole world turned into a blurry mess. But still he couldn't shed them on his way home on the train, clung to his last remnant of dignity as he was. A Prince never cries in public, no matter if he has to bite his trembling lip so hard he can taste blood to refrain himself.

He quickly steers himself towards the bathroom, trying his best to control his labored breath. He's weeping quietly and Ignis isn't coming over tonight due to being assigned at the Citadel for a late Council meeting, but he needs to be sure that none of his neighbors can hear him when he cries his eyes out. He already made enough of a fool of himself today and he can take no more. So he turns on the water in the shower to cover the sobs that are now shaking his body. Gods it hurts so much to have lost his only friend by his own hand. He knows the blond only asked for some time to stomach the issue, but he has a hard time believing it. He can't really blame him if he actually won't speak to him ever again because who on Eos wants to be friends with a liar? He didn't deserve him in the first place and he'll do much better without him. Dammit, how could he even think his friendship with Prompto could last? There must be a reason if in his eighteen years of life people never showed the slighted interest in him aside from the fact that he's the prince. The painful truth is that _Noct_ is just not good enough for anyone to stay. Surely he learned how to protect himself at some point, not letting anyone in so they couldn't make him suffer anymore because in the end loneliness hurts less than being greedily exploited. This time he should have kept his wall up as well; damn, his heart is ripped in two now and it's him the one who made it happen. The blond was the first to ever like him for the dork he is and yet he managed to ruin everything. His breath hitches; deep inside he's sure the blond would have not cared about his status if he had told him right away.

If there's one single thing Noctis is good at it's bottling up his emotions, burying them under a thick shell of impenetrable apathy. This ability allowed him to hide his self-harm habits for literally years, so he's fully aware how unhealthy it is to just keep everything inside until it's too much to bear anymore. He's aware that at some point he will break down and make a mess.

A hot shower would probably do him good now, helping him relax his nerves, so Noctis begins to take off his clothes starting from his jumper. He stares at the raised scars on his arms; he tries his best to ignore them, but he just can't and soon his fingers graze over them. He closes his eyes; it's kind of soothing to feel the lines on his marred skin. Yet he knows he shouldn't be touching them as they bring back too many memories he wants to forget. Burning tears are streaming down face faster now and the once soft laments are now turning into desperate wails.

He forces his stinging eyes open and watches his pathetic reflection in the mirror. A Prince should never cry. But here is Noctis Lucis Caelum, covered in snot for being unable to take responsibility for his own actions. He gags through the sobs at what he sees, he's such a miserable crybaby. His father says a Prince should walk tall and never look back. _Fuck_ , he's so tired of being a good-for-nothing, he wishes he could just disappear so he won't bring any more disgrace to his ancestors.

  


**He doesn't know how** he ended up down there, but Noctis is now curled up in a ball on the cold bathroom tiles, his body shaken by cries and searing pain. Driven by blind self-hatred he must have punched the mirror, breaking it. He's such an idiot, he's only capable of making things worse and worse.

A part of him is glad that Ignis isn't coming over to see him like this, but he's also unsure whether he can get himself out of this alone. He breathes heavily trying not to panic more, then he tries to move his hand, but it hurts so much; he probably broke some bones and the shards of glass stuck deep into his skin make him feel sick. Still he can't give up so he reaches for his wheelchair and grits his teeth trying to lift himself. _Shit_ his wounded hand is slippery with blood and it refuses to sustain his weight, a jolt of excruciating pain ripping all the way up his arm. Noctis groans as he falls hard on the floor, cradling his throbbing hand to his chest.

He's too tired and humiliated to cry any longer, yet tears aren't even close to stop staining his puffy cheeks. He hopelessly stares at his own blood smeared on the white tiles. He probably damaged a vein or something; he knows the wound isn't nearly serious enough to be fatal, but he's scared. _Gods_ , there was a time when he did try to take his own life and the image of that is indelible in his head. It happened what it feels like centuries ago and he doesn't wish to die any more, but the scene he sees in front of him looks dreadfully similar. Rationally he knows he won't die now, but the thought haunts him, bringing back the nightmare. He trembles, struggling to breath. He can already picture the headlines on the newspaper reporting his death: _"Crown Prince of Lucis found dead in his bathroom. Mirror is now under arrest for murder and treason."_ No, he doesn't want to end up like that.

Noctis shuts his eyes; not even the pain he's in can help him focus away from the horror inside his head. Breathe in, breathe out. It's just a panic attack, he's going to pull through all of this.

Finally he hears his phone buzzing in his pocket, a poor distraction from his anguish. He retrieves it with his good hand and shakily unlocks the screen; there's like five texts of apology from Prompto. He so wishes he could hear his voice now. He sighs, he eventually will have to call somebody for help. Ignis should be his first choice, but he'd rather skip the lecture that would come with that; he already knows about his poor life choices, thank you very much. No, he won't call Ignis, he's also busy at the Citadel anyway. Gladio is out of question as well, since he would call him princess and mock him for being so flimsy that all it took to injure him this bad was punching a wall. So Noctis takes a deep breath to swallow his pride and dials the blond's number.

  


**"Noctis are you okay?"** Prompto sounds so concerned, maybe he truly cares for him after all. _Fuck_ , the prince feels so bad to pull him through all of this.

"N-no," he mutters. Used as he is to bottle everything up, sharing his emotions is something new for Noctis, scary and shameful. Is he even doing the right thing opening up with him? He's so scared, but he also needs help; the help of his only friend.

"Dude I was so worried when you ignored all my messages," the boy rambles, his voice trembling slightly. "Are you at home?"

"Yeah, just -" dammit, Noctis can't keep his voice from cracking. He wants to be honest, but it's so hard, he hates showing his weaknesses. "I've done something stupid."

"What do you mean?"

"Got hurt," he mumbles, a thick lump stuck in his throat. He's terrified of what he might think of him after this.

"I'll be right there, just send me your address okay?"

  


**Prompto feels like his heart's** about to burst out of his chest as he run to the nearest train station. It's only a fifteen minutes ride to reach Noctis's apartment, but there's no time to waste. His instinct was right when he sensed something was wrong; his friend wouldn't just skip class for whatever reason. And now he confirmed his suspects, he's at home and he got injured. _Ifrit_ , the blond's so mad that his royal stubborn ass didn't call him earlier, just laying on the bathroom floor for who knows how long instead. Yet he can't really be pissed at him given how worried he actually is. Noctis said it's nothing too serious, but knowing him he's just trying to reassure him. If that boy couldn't get off the floor on his own he's likely to find him in a really bad shape. When they first met Prompto misjudged him for a few seconds and thought he could barely do anything on his own, but Noctis is full of resources and actually lives quite an active life. Surely he can't walk, but that doesn't prevent him from living at his own place, going fishing or doing sports. The blond thinks highly of him because of that.

Finally on the train the blond restlessly shifts his weight from one foot to the other, not even bothering to find a seat. His stomach twists painfully as he checks the time on his phone; the train needs to hurry.

Guilt makes him feel sick as he stares out of the window; he should have talked to him right away. Him being the Prince isn't a big issue for Prompto, but given his reaction Noctis probably thinks it is. To be honest with himself he actually is a bit hurt that the ravenette kept the truth from him, but he can understand he had his reasons to behave like that so he immediately forgave him. Eos be damned, he's not losing his friend because of this, no matter what it takes to fix things.

Eventually the train stops and Prompto darts out of the station, looking for the apartment building Noctis lives in. He quickly makes his way through the nice residential area and for the first time in his life he doesn't get lost, finding it right away. He ran so fast that despite his training he feels dizzy by the time he reached the place, but he has to hurry so he doesn't bother catching his breath and walks in. The security guy at the reception stops him to ask for his identity, letting him go as soon as he sees the invite from Noctis on his phone.

The ride on the elevator takes forever and he finds himself nervously biting his lip in anguish, his heart aching at the thought of what he might find. His stupid brain's making up the worst scenarios when at last he reaches the right floor and rushes to Noctis's door; in his haste he forgot to close it properly.

"Noct?" he says hesitantly as he enters the apartment, not waiting for his answer as he looks for the room he's in.

Prompto freezes when he sees him; he's laying among glass shards on the blood-smeared floor. His eyes are red and swollen from the excessive crying and his lips are turned downwards in a pained pout. The blond stares at him for a few seconds until the numbness that paralyzes him eventually fades and he can breathe again.

"Hey," Noctis says in a coarse voice, looking away as he struggles to sit up. It breaks Prompto's heart to see him like this. Without a second thought he drops to his knees ignoring the sharp mirror pieces digging into his skin and he gently wraps his arms around Noctis. He never hugged him before and his body feels much smaller and fragile under his hands, almost soft. The blond's touch's gentle and he feels the prince sink into his embrace, snuggling closer to his chest as the both of them quietly sob. All of this is too much to bear.

Eventually Prompto wipes away his tears, still not breaking contact from his friend and cuddling him a bit more. He brushes his soft locks until his breath evens, giving him as much comfort as he can.

"We should get you off the floor buddy," he says, giving Noctis a faint of a smile until he shakily nods. It's easier said than done, but eventually the blond manages to help him back on his wheelchair. As expected he complains when his friend forbids him to steer himself out of the bathroom, but in the end he gives up and lets the freckled guy do the job, even reminding him to turn off the water before leaving.

"Where do you keep your first aid kit?" Prompto asks, peeking at his hand in concern. It stopped bleeding, but it looks like it hurts like a bitch, and the strained look on Noctis's pale face is confirming it not so subtly.

"Bathroom cabinet."

Unsurprisingly there's a ton of hair products in there, but after a bit of searching he finds everything he needs and go back to the living room. He sits on the couch in front of Noctis, carefully placing his injured hand on his lap. The blond admires him for how brave he is, stoically sitting still as he slowly pulls the shards out of his flesh with a pair of tweezers; the prince only winces in silence when Prompto extracts the ones stuck deeper. The injury looks way worse now, blood leaking again from the gashes. Noctis hisses when the disinfectant stings on his lacerated skin, but he only grabs his friend's wrist to stop him when he reaches for the gauze to dress his wounds.

"I don't need that, look," he says, grabbing a vial labeled as potion from the kit and pouring its content over the cuts. A sparkling blue-ish mist fills the air, and the blond's mouth drops open in amazement as he watches his friend's skin stitch itself back together, barely leaving some pink scarring.

  


**If there's one type** of magic Noctis is well versed at it's curatives. It's a bit ironic that the reason why he's so good at healing wounds is that he used to hurt himself on purpose. He didn't bother patching himself up at first, but when Ignis discovered his problem and started checking him, covering his deeds became a necessity. So he mastered the art of concocting potions out of common energy drinks.

"See? Good as new," the prince smiles, pain faded almost entirely. He wiggles his fingers just to check that the broken bones are fixed properly before hoisting himself to the couch next to Prompto. He feels so much better now that he's there at his side; physical pain he could have endured, but the ache in his heart was ripping him apart.

"How did you do that?" the blond asks, and the ravenette can't help but chuckle at the incredulous expression on his face. Magic is hard to explain so he takes Prompto's hand between his and makes him feel the tingling sensation of it, grinning as his eyes widen.

"The Royal Family has access to the power of the Crystal," he explains, pausing just a second when he talks about his lineage. "I'm not good at it because of the incident, but I still can do a few tricks."

"Oh, I see," the blond replies, looking away from him.

What Noctis sees in his eyes is something different from pity, it's sadness; sadness because unlike others he truly care for him. So for the first time in his life he speaks further "When I was eight a demon almost killed me," he breathes out; his voice cracks, but he can't stop now; he needs to share this with his friend "I never walked again and it crippled my powers as well."

A single tear falls down the ravenette's cheek; he's so sick of crying. This is the point when people usually commiserate him, saying empty words that make him suffer more, but Prompto's different from them and simply hugs him, hiding his face in the rook of his neck and whispering he's sorry. He's sorry for everything he'd been through. Noctis feels safe in his arms and he can't help holding him closer to his chest, breathing in his scent. _Gods_ , he can't even remember the last time someone cradled and cherished him like this; it was probably ten years ago when his father still bothered to visit him. The sweet embrace doesn't last long, but it's enough to leave a shy smile on Noctis's lips.

He doesn't want to have any secret anymore and there's still one he has to tell, yet it's by far the hardest to approach. He never willingly talked about it, neither to Ignis nor to Gladio. Despite them being his friends they're also his retinue and because of it they have high expectations of him. A future King must be composed and strong, not depressed and insecure.

Noctis takes a deep breath, rubbing his sweaty palms on his pants. He's wearing only a T-shirt so he knows that Prompto has already seen the scars on his arms. He swallows hard, "There's something else you should know."

He stays silent for a while, eyes fixed on his lap; he wants to tell everything, but dammit it's the hardest thing he's ever done.

"Noct, when you punched the mirror you did it to hurt yourself?"

Prompto's words hit him like a truck. He doesn't know if he did it to hurt himself on purpose; of course he knew some damage might occur when you slam your fist into glass so hard it breaks, but it isn't the same thing as what he used to do in the past. Is it?

"I don't know," he admits, his lip trembling, "I'm a mess and I understand if you don't want me any more."

Noctis shudders lightly when the blond's gentle fingers graze over his marred skin, lovingly rubbing on the thick scarring on his wrist. The prince would usually feel deeply ashamed if someone touched him there, but with him it feels different; Prompto's not judging and he trusts him.

"Noct please don't leave me," he whispers, eyes filled with tears. The prince feels bad at seeing him cry like for him, so he does his best reassure him, wiping away the solitary tear running down his cheek.

"I'm not going anywhere," he smiles, cuddling the blond until he's calm enough.

"I don't want you to get hurt again," he mumbles.

"Won't happen. They gave me meds and I'm okay now, I promise," Noctis's stomach can't stop churning. He won't make him worry this much ever again; he _has to_ be better for him. 

  


**"It's getting late** , why won't you stay here for the night Prompto?"

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Trigger free summary:** blaming himself for what happened, once at home Noctis punches a mirror in in his bathroom, getting hurt. Despite panicking, he finds the strength to call Prompto for help.


	6. English Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After some heavy confessions, Noctis invites Prompto to stay for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** This chapter contains mentions of an eating disorder and mentions of a past suicide attempt. None of it is graphic though and they're literally just mentions so the whole chapter should be safe to read. Just to be on the safer side be aware that the mentions of an eating disorder are in the first block, while the mentions of the past suicide attempt are in the second block.

**Noctis had to insist** quite a lot to convince him to stay for the night, but in the end Prompto just couldn't refuse. After the prince's confession of having suffered from severe depression for years they spent hours talking, slowly telling each other all of their secrets. Knowing that his friend had to constantly fight against demons tearing him apart from the inside made Prompto's heart sink; he knows way too well how it feels like to hate yourself so much you want to disappear. For somewhat reason he had come to care deeply for Noctis in the few weeks they had known each other, and he would do anything in his power to make him feel better. Dammit, it hurt so much to know that the person he'd give the world at one point got it so bad that he even tried to take his own life. The blond can't even imagine how dark those days must've been for Noctis, yet trying to starve yourself to death isn't that different, is it?

Prompto hopes his friend didn't hear his stomach grumbling, but the grin on his smug face proves otherwise.

"You hungry?" the ravenette asks with a smirk, gently poking at the blond's belly. With all that happened he forgot to eat lunch today, and since his breakfast consists of half a grapefruit, a piece of puffed rice cake and tea by now he really needs to eat something.

"Um, yeah," he mutters, fidgeting with his hands.

"Wanna order a pizza? I can't cook for shit," Noctis laughs with a broad smile. _Shit_ , pizza's like the blond's biggest fear.

"Noct, there's something I have to tell you."

"Sure, you know you can tell me everything, right?" the prince encourages him, placing gentle hand on his shoulder.

"I um - please don't think bad of me like I'm crazy or something," he swallows thickly, fighting the urge to cry, "but I can't have pizza."

"You're allergic or something? There's nothing to be ashamed of," Noctis guesses, rubbing slow circles on Prompto's back to sooth him.

"No, I'm - shit I'm sorry I'm such a mess," tears are welling up in his bright blue eyes, but he keeps talking, "you know how I always skip eating cake and stuff? Well truth is calories scare the shit out of me," he gulps, "I'm getting better now, but sometimes anorexia still kicks my ass." 

It was so scary to tell Noctis about his eating disorder, but since he accepted to stay for the night dinner has become something he couldn't easily skip, so he finally spills the truth. He'd been suffering from anorexia since he was fourteen, and even if he's recovering now his diet's still strict and he's wary of high-calorie stuff. It's kind of relieving to have his friend finally know given how many times he had to lie to avoid having lunch together; every time the prince asked him to go to the Crow's Nest after class he had to make up something, feeling deeply guilty afterwards.

"It's okay Prompto, you're strong and I'm sure you'll win this war," the prince hugs him softly, swiping away with his thumb a sigle tear running down the blond's freckly cheek, "I admire you for being brave enough to tell me, and I'll always be there for you, I promise."

"So, what are you comfortable eating? We really should have dinner and I don't want to force you have anything that makes you anxious," Noctis is way more accepting than he could have ever hoped for, which makes him almost cry again. He ponders what to answer for a few seconds; vegetables are usually his safe choice, but he's aware of how deeply his friend hates them, so the blond dies a little suggesting them, "greens are out of question, right?"

Noctis snorts in the cutest way possible and his disgusted face's the most adorable thing he's seen in a while.

"Icky. As long as you don't make _me_ eat them you can have as much as you like though," the ravenette cackles, heading towards the kitchen, "given there's any of it in my fridge at all." Unsurprisingly veggies are severely banned from the royal household unless Ignis secretly sneaks them in, and all is currently available is a saggy cabbage that should belong to the trash-bin. Prompto'd rather avoid carbs for dinner, but when his friend shows him the contents of his fridge and storage, both completely devoid of anything healthy, but shamelessly stocked with microwaveable meals, cup noodles and junk food he realizes he can't be too picky. Apparently the prince's so bad at cooking that he accidentally set his toaster on fire once; since then he fed himself exclusively with pre-cooked stuff that only needed the microwave for heating, be it either bought or prepared by Ignis. However, despite his dreadfully unbalanced diet the prince just didn't gain weight. Prompto's never been that lucky with his metabolism, even more so since he fucked it up completely due to his illness.

"Is instant ramen okay for you? I'm afraid it's all I have," Noctis hesitantly asks, grimacing a little. It's not ideal, but Prompto's already worried enough of being a hassle as it is, so he nods.

"Awesome, I have regular ones, Zu egg flavor, Behemoth meat, Karlabos and the _Real Taste_ special edition," he lists, now proudly rummaging through the crammed shelf .

"I'll go for regular, thanks," Prompto timidly decides, making his friend chuckle.

"Nice choice, good old regulars are always the best," the prince approves, picking up two boxes from the shelf and placing them onto his lap, "Gladio's obsessed with this stuff, he even boils eggs and shit to put on top saying it makes it even better than real ramen." It's weird hearing Noctis talk so much as usually he's the quiet one. The blond smiles shyly, appreciating the effort. 

He's not sure what he did to deserve such an amazing friend, but he feels so good next to the ravenette that he almost wants to cry. Usually he'd be extremely nervous at eating in front of someone else, but the prince's supporting and doesn't urge him; his broth's cold by the times he finishes it, but for the first time in ages Prompto managed to eat all of his portion; even now that he's recovering and he gained some weight back he always leaves a couple of bites out of old habits. The prince looks pleased, so with a crimson blush hiding his freckles Prompto jokes about how food made with love tastes better; his friend snorts in response, but deep inside they both know it's true.

  


**Noctis can't sleep,** not when Prompto's snuggled close to him in his bed. His heart's racing in his chest, although he can't complain about it either; no matter how sleepy he is, the blond has an hypnotic effect on him and he could stare at the peaceful expression painted on his adorably freckled face for hours, the light noise of his breaths a lullaby to his ears. Gods, he's so cute with those slightly parted lips he thinks, humming softly as he breathes in his sweet scent. Prompto's presence is warm and pleasant against him; he's never felt this comfortable in his entire life, so much that he wants to savor all of it for as long as he can, even if it means avoiding to fall asleep.

Ignis will throw a fit when he finds him in Noctis's bed the next morning, but he doesn't care. The two of them are just sharing a bed and there's nothing wrong with it. Noctis feels his cheeks heathen up; even if they weren't only _sleeping_ together there wouldn't be anything wrong with it either since they're both are adults. His flush burns darker; he can't possibly have just thought about _that_ ; Prompto's just a friend.

The prince's exhausted from all that happened today, yet he can't stop ruminate about it. He'd fucked up greatly this time, yet his friend forgave him and stayed at his side. He's not sure what on Eos made him deserve such kindness, and the thought of it makes him sniffle a bit. Geez, he's thankful Prompto's fast asleep, because even if he's seen him cry already it's still embarrassing. His friend's the sweetest, kind hearted person he's ever met, and he'll try his best to keep him close. In the past he's always pushed people away; he even managed to keep distance with Gladio and Ignis for a while, which says something given how both of them care for him deeply. It happened a bit over a year ago, when depression got at its worst.

Pissing off Gladio was easy, he just had to push the right buttons. He kept slacking off training, bitterly complaining about how all of it was useless anyway since he could never fight for real while being in a wheelchair. If he truly was to be king one day, then Lucis wouldn't stand a chance in the war against the Empire, so the Kingdom'd better surrender and hand him to the enemy. He knew how proud Gladio is of his role as a Shield, and suggesting that at some point he'll have to fail his duty and betray his king cut deep. That was the only time Gladio ever hit him outside of training. As if making him cross the line of injuring the one person he was supposed to protect with his own life wasn't enough, Noctis kept talking, insinuating with a smirk how he was learning quickly, all while smearing with the back of his hand the blood trickling down from his split lip.

Ignis was harder to push away, since his devotion for him rooted even deeper. Yet at some point he managed to hurt him nevertheless; he kept up all the behaviors he knew annoyed him, like keeping his house a mess on purpose, neglecting his appearance and especially ignoring the political reports he was supposed to read and discuss about. Again, he told how in the end if he ever really became king, the council and Ignis himself would rule in his stead for the Kingdom's sake. He spat that he was well aware how the chamber despised him; his advisor was just wasting his time trying to teach him stuff, while young prince Noctis was way too dumb to ever get a grasp on it. The last drop that finally made Ignis distant was to remind him that their relationship was build on the fact that he was _payed_ to do stuff for him, insinuating they weren't friends and so he could just stop pretending he truly cared about him. Those words broke Ignis's heart, and for months he only behaved in a strictly professional manner, exclusively referring to him as _your Highness_.

His father was the only one he never managed to push away completely; but how can you truly cut off someone who isn't really there for you? It happened during their monthly dinner together, and due to a meeting running longer than expected the king arrived one hour late. Noctis behaved bratty all the time, and eventually implied that the king didn't care about him, suggesting they'd better quit organizing those fake _family_ dinners since they made them both uncomfortable. Regis tried his best to reassure his son, but the teenager kept bitterly insisting; the cherry on top was the comment that if _his Majesty_ was so ashamed of having a son like him he'd better give in the council's pressures to marry again, knock up the new queen and make a better heir. After that their dinners together became more tense, but his dad never gave up on him although Noctis tried his best to isolate himself.

Despite everything, when Noctis woke up in a hospital bed after his suicide attempt Regis was at his side, holding his hand softly the same way he had done after the incident that left him in a wheelchair. Ignis and Gladio were there as well, their faces tired and anguished just as much as the king's. For mere seconds he felt loved then, but his dark thoughts soon struck him and he realized how probably all of them were simply worried because he had just nearly died, while for one reason or another they needed him. He was an utter wreck, and started sobbing uncontrollably; all he'd done was because he never wanted to witness any of that. Regis shushed him softly, asking the two boys to leave them alone. Then he held Noctis close to his chest and asked for forgiveness; he didn't recognize how deeply his son was suffering and left him to deal with his demons alone. He told him how much he loved him, how he'd always been so proud of him, and how he was sorry for not having told him sooner. The prince felt so ashamed and guilty, he wanted to disappear; tears couldn't stop staining his soft cheeks, no matter how hard he tried to stop them. He treated his dad and his friends like shit, and yet they were all by his side now. He clung to his dad, who kept gently brushing his dark locks to sooth him and kept repeating everything was going to be okay. Nobody was angry at him, and all that mattered was that he was safe now. He'd get all the help he needed, and they'd never let him feel alone and hopeless ever again.

  


**The prince yawns lazily** ; he's tired, but he's still not ready to give in to slumber. He glances again at the blond's chest, hardly lifting with every shallow breath. Noctis's moogle-chocobo carnival T-shirt looks so good on him and he can't help but smile, remembering his wide eyes when he asked him to change into that. He was sure Prompto would've liked it given his sweet obsession for chocobos, and yellow happens to suit him a lot. It's a shame that he mostly wears baggy clothes, because he's one of those people who can easily pull off pretty much anything.

It hurts to know that Prompto had to go through a lot of shit, and he feels guilty he was too blind to notice he wasn't okay. They had breakfast together pretty often, and for a reason or another the blond always managed to eat little to nothing while he chugged down a considerable amount of unsweetened coffee instead. The prince naively thought he was just skinny by constitution, and his workout routine simply went along well with him being a runner. Yet something should've clicked when in over a month the only managed to have lunch together a couple of times, especially when Prompto always found a weird excuses not to go to fast food or pizza places. What's done is done, but at least he knows the truth now so he can support his friend on his journey to a full recovery.

Before they hugged he had no idea how thin Prompto actually was since his over-sized sweaters hide his figure knowingly well. He feels almost bony under his T-shirt, and the prince's afraid he'll break him if he holds him too tight. The prince swears under his breath he'll do whatever in his power to make him feel better about himself. His face heats up in the dark; always found the blond to be gorgeous, and knowing how little self-esteem he has is upsetting.

The prince pulls him closer to his body, cuddling him as he finally decides to close his eyes.

  


**Prompto's the first to wake up** the next morning; it's half past six, meaning their alarm won't go off before another half an hour. He lazily stirs in the duvet, being careful not to jostle too much the prince still fast asleep next to him; even in the low light of dawn his alabaster complexion almost glows, making him look like a real-life sleeping beauty. He takes the time to admire Noctis's relaxed expression. His features aren't as soft as Prompto's, in fact his nose and cheekbones are almost on the sharp side, yet the whole of his face structure carries an otherworldly grace that betrays his noble origins.

Their legs are still all tangled from the cuddling position they fell asleep into, and he can't help holding Noctis closer. There's something soothing in the sweet earthy scent coming from his raven locks, and Prompto fills his lungs with it, humming in appreciation; he's never felt so at home before.

He must've fallen asleep again because the alarm going off startles him; usually he'd turn it off and get up right away, but there's a warm weight trapping him under the covers. Apparently even snoozing it is too much for the barely awaken prince, who groans as he hides his face under his pillow to escape from the irritating sound.

"Dude, at least snooze it," he urges, grimacing at the incessant beeping.

"Ugh, sleepy," the prince mumbles incoherently, twisting in the sheets. Prompto chuckles; he knew he wasn't a morning person, but what he's witnessing is simply the next level of laziness.

Finally the blond manages to climb over Noctis and reach the clock on the table on the other side of the bed, sighing in relief as he turns the alarm off. The moment the room goes silent, a pair of arms encircle his waist and drag him down again.

"Noct it's late, we should get up," he tries to protest, but his friend's sweet embrace is too much to resist. Noctis just re-emerged from under his pillow only to hide into the crook of Prompto's neck instead; his warm breath tickles the blond's skin, making him giggle, "you're the cutes, buddy."

"Am not," the ravenette objects, nuzzling his neck and holding him tighter not to let him leave the bed.

"I didn't expect you to be this cuddly," the blond teases, petting his friend's messy hair.

"It's 'cause you're warm," the prince smirks, refusing yet again to let Prompto go, who hugs him back before starting to tickle his sides in the most treacherous manner possible. 

  


"Your highness!" a voice with a stiff English accent blurts out.


	7. Green Curry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis gets in trouble because nothing is like it seems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** none.
> 
>  
> 
>  **A message from the author:** I apologize for the delay , as this chapter was supposed to be uploaded yesterday. My mental health hasn't been the best last week and I didn't manage to write as much as I was meant to. Nothing to worry though, and hopefully the few days off I have next week will do me good!

**Fragile like a soap bubble,** happiness is easy to take away. As soon as Ignis unpredictably bursts the door open, the once filled with laughter room falls utterly silent, joy suddenly replaced by nerve-wracking fear. Noctis visibly pales at the sight of his advisor, slowly but inescapably walking towards the bed. His whole body instinctively stiffens, a thick dryness crawling up his throat until he feels like he's inexorably drowning in sand. This is not how things were supposed to go.

Ignis always passes by to pick him up - and more often than not even wake him up - for university at half past seven, and as a matter of fact he's the most punctual person in the entire kingdom. Therefore it seemed more than a reasonable plan to set their alarm clock at seven o'clock, so that Prompto could comfortably get up and leave before the bespectacled man's arrival. Geez, he was supposed to leave with a few minutes to spare. But today, due to some unfathomable misfortune Ignis, the always-on-time and routine-affectionate Ignis, had for whatever reason decided to come to Noctis's place at merely ten past seven.

"Your Highness! I hope you have a convincing explanation for this," the advisor roars, staring at the blond so intensively the prince's afraid he might catch fire.

"I, we - I swear it's not how it looks," Noctis stutters, barely finishing the sentence before the lump in his throat gets too thick to continue, making him literally choke on his own words. The little he managed to mumble is clearly not impressive at all though given the piercing look coming from his retainer's narrowed green eyes, telltale raised brow and all.

"So enlighten me," the young man urges, adjusting his glasses in an annoyed fashion.

"Um, it's not like I could make him sleep on the couch," the ravenette slurs in a vane attempt of giving a cheeky reply.

"I suspected a cute blond didn't just pop up in your bed without invite," the advisor scoffs, "so please, illuminate me on why he's here if it's not how it looks."

"I, uh, didn't feel too good after class, so Prompto volunteered to take me home," the boy lies, wincing a little; Ignis is the most intelligent guy he knows and he's never gonna buy it.

"And I assume you didn't deem your queasiness to be serious enough to alert either Gladiolus or myself about it," the advisor bitterly interrupts, pinching his nose the way he does when something truly irks him, "given you truly felt unwell of course, which I honestly don't believe; but please, continue."

"You were busy all day so I didn't think -"

"That's the bloody point! You never _think_ , Noctis," Ignis cuts him, his voice imperceptibly raised, but still as stern as ice, "I'm aware that being the heir to the throne is a matter of insignificant value for you, but I must remind you that you cannot ignore the obligations that such position lays upon you," he exhales, marking the seriousness of his concern, "I understand you're rather fond of this Prompto, but that is no excuse for this irresponsible escapade. I expect at least you kept the debauchery within private walls."

"But I was sick -"

"Oh, I'm sure your illness was nothing serious, if existent at all, given the leisure activities you endeavored afterwards," the brunette sneers, not even allowing the younger boy to really justify what happened.

"Stop it Ignis! We didn't fucking have sex!" the prince protests, feeling his face heathen up uncomfortably. Dammit, everything else was a blatant lie, but he and Prompto truly did nothing inappropriate. He's so upset he's quivering, but a part of him understands Ignis for not believing him; he's betrayed his trust far too many times to ask for blind faith after all, and it's his retainer's work to look after him when he fails to do it himself. Not to mention that this is actually the first time he's seeing him with a friend, and they happen to be compromisingly tangled together in bed. It still hurts not to be believed though, especially when the matter of the accusation is him being in a secret relationship with the guy he _might_ have a slight crush on, and who totally isn't into him.

"Your highness, it's understandable for a boy your age to be willing to explore his sexuality, and I'd worry if it were the contrary. Nevertheless I must remind you how careful someone in your position should be," Ignis continues, glaring at the blond so intensively it burns.

  


**"I swear to the gods** , I didn't touch him, I never would!" Prompto suddenly blurts out; he kept silent the whole time, and now that he took the courage to intervene he's so pale his freckles stand out with astonishing prominence. He's almost shaking, but he keeps defending Noctis, as if some invisible force was urging him to, "we're just friends, nothing more!"

The blond already failed to protect his friend from Dino's threatens the previous morning, so he won't keep his mouth shut anymore, even if it means standing against the most terrifying butler he's ever met. Not that he truly knows many other butlers, but given how hostile this one is he's kind of wary of adding more to the list.

"Noct felt a bit sick, so I got home with him. Then we kind of lost track of time, and since it was dark already he asked me to stay for the night," Prompto babbles, trying his best not to falter because if he stops talking he's not sure he'd have the guts to open his mouth ever again, "please, it's the truth!"

"So tell me, Prompto, do the broken mirror in the bathroom have anything to do with His Higness's queasiness?" the spectacled man interrogates, making  
the blond gasp. He helped Noctis clean everything up, but obviously the evidence was still there. The prince had confided in him, revealing his struggle with mental health.  
He didn't spare him the details, the heartbreaking tale of how he hurt his friends due to his lack of self-worth and how badly that ended included.  
So he kind of gets where all Ignis's concerns are coming from; fuck, he's worried about Noctis too but putting him  
under all of this pressure isn't doing him any good. "That was my fault," he lies, "I slipped and it shattered, I'm so sorry." He feels like his heart could burst out of his  
chest as he mumbles the lamest excuse to cover his friend, but Noctis deserves someone to be at his side this time. There's something special in the ravenette, something  
that makes Prompto feel like he _has_ to protect him, to keep him safe as the precious thing he is. Because Noctis is the best thing that ever happened to him and  
he'd do anything in his power and even more not to ever lose him.

"It's a miracle you came out of it uninjured then," the brunette sarcastically comments, as if his dislike for Prompto rooted so deeply he truly wished for him to get hurt. Or so the blond thinks, but given his low self-esteem and the current situation everything would feel like an attack to him.

"He didn't," Noctis interrupts, helping him keep up the tale, "he got a nasty cut on his hand, so I concocted a potion to heal him."

Ignis's eyes are narrowed in indication that he isn't completely convinced, but he doesn't insist either so maybe the two boy can finally breathe, 

"Hurry up now, or you'll be late for class."

  


**Noctis was worried that** Prompto's disastrous first encounter with Ignis would leave some terrible first impression, but thankfully it didn't. The blond is a ball of sunshine after all, so it didn't take long for him to gain the advisor's sympathy; which anyway isn't that surprising given how quickly he breached the thick wall of apathy surrounding the prince himself, an achievement that no one had even succeeded before in his eighteen years of life. Of course, the retainer was concerned at first, both because of Noctis's relative inexperience with handling human relationships, and because of the potential scandal if the two of them were to be seen out in public together.

The first matter, which was the one that worried him the most, happened to be relatively easy to overcome; it was soon clear how Prompto was a kind-hearted and genuine person and he wasn't befriending the prince for any reason other than friendship itself. It would've broken Ignis's heart if the boy was in some way trying to exploit Noctis, as it would've destroyed his already fragile self-esteem and trust in others.

The second matter was a harder one, but in the end the two boys managed to convince him that they weren't dating and that they'd be careful about their actions while in public. Under King Regis Lucis Caelum CXIII's rule, the kingdom had approved several laws to safeguard citizens of any gender and sexual orientation, legalizing both marriage and adoption for same-sex couples. However a big part of the country still retained a conservative mindset, so the heir to throne's homosexuality would still be a delicate matter to share to the public. Historically the right to ascend to the throne had been strictly inherited by bloodline, so even if the king could legally marry another man he would still have to fulfill his duty of leaving a descendant, as royal adoptions were forbidden.

As weeks passed Prompto's presence became more and more prominent in Noctis's life; not only they'd meet everyday at university, but the blond would also come over to the prince's apartment after class under Ignis's suggestion.

Of course he's happy he can can spend all of this time with him, but as Noctis glances at his two friends cheerily chatting together in the kitchenette while they prepare green curry for dinner he can't help but wince at the hint of jealousy clawing at his heart. Since they convinced Ignis that they are simply friends, the advisor started to open up more, showing even slight signs of affection; surely, he told Noctis that he mostly likes the blond because of his power to bring joy into the prince's solitary life. Genuine smiles used to be an extremely rare appearance on the ravenette's lips, but since he befriended Argentum not anymore; he seems way happier now, and since his wellbeing is a part of Ignis's responsibilities he encourages them to spend time together.

Rationally Noctis knows that his advisor isn't truly _hitting on_ Prompto, but hearing them chuckle makes his stomach churn. Ignis is tall and handsome, his well-toned body dressed in a casually elegant manner that gives him a charm that he can only dream of. He stares at the pleased look on his gorgeous face, then at the beam on the freckled blond's. They're cooking Prompto's favorite, and the retainer is yet again complimenting him for how good of a job he's doing at stirring.

  


**The prince tries to** ignore how the curry he's eating tastes like betrayal, mumbling how Prompto's getting better at cooking under Ignis's expert teachings. He swallows another bitter spoonful, then excuses his friends and goes to the bathroom. He feels like he might throw up, so he turns the tap to wash his face with some fresh water. He dry heaves a couple of times, then he clenches his his fists until his knuckles turn white and takes a few deep breaths to calm himself.

He so wishes it's just his imagination tricking him, but he clearly saw Prompto blush and giggle when Ignis maybe not-so-accidentally brushed his hand while handing him the water. He know he has no right to be jealous about the blond, they're simply friends and not in a million years he'd be interested into someone like him. _Shit_ , he knows he deserves way better than him, and Ignis is exactly _that_ better. Smooth and athletic, smart and charismatic he's everything he's not. He's aware he shouldn't compare himself to others, and that his failings aren't his advisor's fault, but it isn't fair to concur for Prompto's heart like this; he doesn't stand a chance. Noctis bites on his trembling lip, trying his best not to burst into tears. Even if the advisor wasn't around the blond would still be too far out of his league, he knows that. Breathe in, breathe out. Who on Eos would ever want to date him, a socially awkward nerd who's chronically depressed, covered in scars and who can't even fucking walk. He sniffles slightly; he shouldn't be denigrating himself so badly, but it's hard to do otherwise, even more so when most of his defects are physically there and not simply in his mind. Even if for whatever crazy and impossible reason he'd have a chance with Prompto he shouldn't take it; he deserves better than a broken and good-for-nothing prince.

When he finally emerges from the bathroom Prompto's in the hallway, wearing his jacket and ready to leave.

"I'm sorry dude, it's getting late and I have training tomorrow morning," he sadly smiles, "thanks for everything,"

"No problem," the prince replies, not even watching his friend in the eyes.

"See you tomorrow. Thank you too, Iggy. Goodnight."

"Have a safe trip home, Prompto."

Noctis's ears start buzzing as the blond closes the door; he just stays there, staring at it. He called his retainer _Iggy_. He's the only one to call him that, which is something they invented when they were kids. Geez, he could probably still walk when he gave Ignis that nickname, how old and intimate of a thing that is. If Prompto calls him that too there must be something going on between them. 

He gently locks his bedroom door behind himself, just in time for a single tear to fall down his puffy cheek. He could never imagine a heartbreak to be so painful, it's astonishing. It feels like icy hands clawing at his insides, slowly squeezing his heart until it hurts too much to even breathe. He loves Prompto deeply and he's been feeling that way for a while now; he's his ray of sunshine in the dark and his shelter under the storm. He loves him so much and yet he can't have him, because he deserves more that he can offer. For quite some time he liked to think that all he cared for was the blond's happiness, and that he was okay just being friends and daydreaming about something more. Surely, someday Prompto would find someone special, but he though he'd make his peace and be ready to step aside by then; after all that one time his advisor found them in bed together Prompto himself confessed that he had no romantic interest in the prince whatsoever! Noctis had since then somewhat accepted that he had no right to be jealous, but life is merciless and of all of the people his friend could fall for, he chose Ignis, condemning him to witness their blooming relationship. It's excruciating, but he has to bear it down and pretend everything is fine for the blond's sake.

Noctis shifts into his bed and hides under the duvet, not even bothering to undress. Hopefully his pillow will cover his sobs as he softly cries himself to sleep.


	8. Balamb Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis has to finally face his feelings for Prompto.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** none.

**"Was Prompto busy today?"** Ignis casually asks as he enters the Prince's apartment. The place is surprisingly silent when the blond is absent, which has become a rather rare occurrence in the past two months.

"Dunno, didn't ask," Noctis gloomily replies, not even raising his head from the hand-held game console he's playing _Justice Monsters Five_ from.

"Did something happen?" the advisor asks, a mild concern transpiring from his tone; some indifference coming from the younger boy isn't unusual, but the thick atmosphere in the room is.

"Nope," the ravenette cuts off annoyed, still deeply focused on his game.

"Noctis, I can tell something is wrong. Did you argue with Prompto?" investigates the man, briefly adjusting his glasses before heading towards the couch the prince is slumped on.

"Did not," he exhales heavily, holding his console closer to his face to hide how close to tears he is. He and Prompto always spend Friday nights together to watch some movie, but today he decided not to invite him, despite them having made plans of watching the new _Balamb Garden_ movie which was to be released on _zu-flix_ that night; _geez_ his best friend had been babbling about the amazing computer graphics and shit for weeks.

In his mind simply saying _"see you on Monday"_ instead of asking Prompto to come over was supposed to be a painless way to keep some distance, but it didn't work out the way he intended. He was supposed to gradually dissociate from his friend, trying to be colder and slowly starting to spend less and less time together. He was rather aloof the whole week, and he's sure the blond immediately noticed his change in behavior because he bloody asked him multiple times if he was okay. And of course he said he was. Eventually, when the usual invite didn't come, Prompto still quietly replied to have a nice weekend and walked away, but he sounded hurt. _Shit_ , it wasn't Noctis's intention to hurt him, actually it was far from it. His feelings for the blond had gotten in the way of being a good friend, so he'd better disappear from his life before he makes more damage.

"Please, Your Highness, tell me what's bothering you," Ignis insists, sitting next to the younger boy. _Fuck_ , there's so much stuff that's bothering him; even if he wanted to answer he'd still be unable to decide where to start from, and the fact that he just fucked up his only friendship - because Prompto didn't text him the whole afternoon so he's clearly mad at him for being ditched - is only the cherry on top.

Noctis had sworn to himself that he'd never ruin a friendship ever again, but apparently he's got a talent for wrecking everything he cares for and now Prompto hates him. He was so selfish and heartless, running away because he was jealous and couldn't cope with the fact that the other has feelings and wills of his own. He bites on his trembling lip, almost drawing blood; it hurts so much to push away the one you love, but watching him being happy with another man is excruciatingly unbearable.

The prince takes a deep breath, unceremoniously dropping the console on the cushion, "I - I won't see Prompto anymore," he slurs, eyes filled with trapped tears, "please promise me you'll treat him well and make him happy."

"Noctis, what are you talking about?" the advisor asks, his voice almost shaking with worry as he grabs Noctis's hand, as if he could disappear any moment if he didn't, "Why wouldn't you see Prompto anymore?"

Noctis sniffles, shying away from Ignis's touch, "please promise me. He deserves the world,"

"What's going on? Are you planning on doing something to yourself?" the retainer panics.

 _Dammit_ , the teenager feels so guilty; his life choices have always been so poor that everyone around him must constantly assume the worst. And if he can't even take care of himself, he surely won't do any good to Prompto if they stick together, even just as friends.

"Am not," he reassure, squeezing the older boy's hand, "it's just - uh, I know there's something between you and Prompto and," he swallow thickly, "it's the best if I step aside."

"I don't understand," the man's green eyes widen, apprehension fading a bit.

"Prompto deserves someone that makes him happy. I wish I were that someone, but I'm not," Noctis's voice cracks, unable to hold on the tears any longer. He tries to hide his face, but he's trapped on that damn couch. How miserable must he be to embarrass himself and cry in front of man who stole the heart of his first love; he just wants to disappear and be forgotten for good.

"Oh, Noctis," the advisor hugs him gently, "there must be a misunderstanding. There's no romantic interest whatsoever between Prompto and I."

"Shut it! I've seen the way he giggles when you're around!" Noctis blurts out, "but it's fine. You're better that I'll ever be. Promise me you'll make him happy,"

"I assure you, there's nothing between Prompto and I, and I'd never interfere with your friendship."

"So why do you always ask me about him! Or suggest to invite him over!" the boy yells, tears streaming down his cheeks.

The young man exhales, adjusting his glasses, "since he came into your life you look incredibly happier, Noctis. And after all the years I spent watching you suffer, unable to make you smile no matter the effort, if some blond happens to be able to bring you joy I'll do whatever I can to make him stay, and make sure of his wellbeing." He gently pets the prince's raven locks, then continues "I apologize if my behavior towards him made you uncomfortable; I'd never flirt with your friend, even more so when you clearly have a crush on him. Because of course, you're not as subtle as you think and for months now I was suspicious your feelings for him weren't simply those of a caring friend, but you kept insisting you weren't romantically interested in him every time I asked."

He knows Ignis is trying to make him feel better, but it keeps getting worse. He can barely breathe; it's like a knife had stabbed through his heart and then ripped it from his chest. What's the worst now is that his advisor would never lie to him, so when he says he wasn't hitting on Prompto it's the truth. Which means that he immensely fucked up and left him alone because his insecurities made him misjudge and see things that weren't real. He was just trying to step aside to make them be happy _together_ , dammit!

"Now, what happened with Prompto?"

"I'm such an idiot," he gulps, trying his best to talk somewhat coherently, "I've been a jerk to him today, I never even texted him." Now that he speaks it out loud, what he did seems even worse.

"I'm sure it all can be fix, but it's up to you," Ignis reassures, rubbing circles with his thumb on the back of the prince's hand in a way the used to sooth him when he had nightmares as a child.

"I don't want to lose him," Noctis sobs; it's hard to stop crying when you can't see a way out. Sure, he can simply apologize and probably Prompto would forgive him and be his best friend again, but that only postpones the problem. He doesn't think he can truly hide his feelings forever, and if Ignis discovered the truth it's likely that someday Prompto will fiund out as well.

"So you won't. I assure you that Prompto cares for you more than you imagine, and will gladly accept your apologies. However, I suggest you to be completely honest with him."

But how can you confess your love when you're crippled and broken, and as if it wasn't enough you're also the heir to the throne of a war-ravaged kingdom on the verge of collapse?

  
**He should have imagined** that being friends with the prince couldn't last. It all seemed great at first, they would often hang out for breakfast before class, and in a few months he even became a regular guest at the royal household. But Prompto Argentum is nobody special, and it's no surprise if people get bored of him when neither his parents bother to spend much time with him. Actually it's amazing how Noctis put up with his shit for so long, even more so when someone in his position could meet and befriend literally anyone he wanted, professional videogame players included. He should just be grateful for the good time they had together and move on.

It's not that easy to forget about Noctis though; once you get to know him, under the thick surface there's a shy and sweet boy, generous and always ready to help others. It's so weird how suddenly it all changed, it's like for somewhat reason the prince shut himself off from everything, being apathetic and even bitter to all the blond did and said; he was so different it was hard to even recognize him.

A part of him blames himself for what happened; he's annoying and talks way too much, so his friend understandably just got sick of him and ditched him. But somewhere deep inside his heart he knows that's not quite the truth; they never openly argued, and even today when Noct behaved the coldest there still were a few moments when he was gentle and caring towards him. So more than upset for the ruined friendship Prompto is worried; the prince told him how things got bad once, and he's deeply concerned that it might happen again. He's not going to text Noctis, as he doesn't want to make things worse, but he does message Ignis to keep an eye on him.

During the past month he got somewhat closer to his friend's retainer, Ignis. The guy's only a couple of years older than them, but behaves in such a mature a manner that he appears way older, so much that at some point he started to refer him as _Noct's mom_ while thinking to himself. Like every good mother, he spends a lot of time at the prince's apartment, and like every good mother, he likes to share cute anecdotes about the princeling's childhood. It's this way that Prompto discovered how Noctis used to be an extremely lively child before the accident, to the point where the little rogue painted the Citadel in mud once. Those tales always make him giggle like some crazy fanboy. 

It was nice to get to know all of those small details about Noctis's life, but often he wished they could spend more time alone. When the advisor's around the prince's a little stiffer than his normal self, as he has to hide part of his dorky side and colorful language lest he wants to be lectured about what is unacceptable behavior for royalty. He knows it's Ignis's job to be there, since he's the one who cooks and does most of the houseworks, but sometimes his presence's just too invasive. He sighs, if only they could spend their time together at his house it would be much better, but sadly it's not possible.

His parents and him live in a two-storied house in a residential area twenty minutes away by car from the prince's apartment. Unfortunately the neighborhood is built on top of a small slope, so the fifteen minutes walk from the station is impossible to do in a wheelchair. Even if Noctis convinced Ignis to drive him there it wasn't the best place to spend their time together either, as Prompto's room is upstairs, hence unreachable for the prince. Sure, they could just stay in the living room since his parents are always out anyway, but the bathroom happens to be too small and completely unaccessible for Noctis to use. He knows how proud his friend is, and it broke his heart when that one time he visited him he had to throw his independence out of the window and ask for help when he needed to pee. Of course, he'd do anything to help his best friend and he didn't even have to see anything naked, but it hurt to see how embarrassed the ravenette looked.

Therefore since then they always spent their time together at Noctis's place instead. The blond exhales heavily; he misses his friend so much and he so hopes things can get fixed. He already trained today, but he's a bit anxious and a bit of exercise always helps him relax so he decides to go out for a run.

  


NoctGar

**Today** 05:40 PM

  
**NoctGar:** I'm such jerk, Im sorry. You've always been a good friend to me, and I ended up treating you like shit, messing everything up.  
That's all I ever do, ruin everything I touch.  
So I just thought youd do way better without me, and maybe I was right given how badly I fucked things up. You're special Prompto, and u deserve the best in your life, and I'm always scared  
Im not good enough for you. All Ive ever been capable of is hurting the ones who are close to me, and so I did 2 u, even though I promised u I'd be better.  
I so wish you could forgive me, you're the best friend Ive ever had and I don't wanna lose u. Geez I'd do anything 2 fix things up, but I know it's not easy and if   
dont wanna see me ever again now I get it, I deserve it. But please I beg u, at least give me the chance to talk and apologize properly  


**ChocoBoi_36:** Noctis

**ChocoBoi_36:** It's okay, Ill talk to you

**ChocoBoi_36:** Ill be there as fast as i can

**It's weird when you rush** to a place to receive what you think will be bad news, because you can't get there fast enough, yet the travel is too short. Prompto sighs, wishing he could have prepared himself more as he rings the prince's doorbell. The door of the apartment building clicks open, so he swiftly steps inside and heats to the elevator; the ride to the eleventh floor takes what it seems like an eternity, but he still wishes he could have just stayed in there forever. His palms are swearing as he walks towards the door, his steps faltering a bit.

Noctis is waiting for him in his apartment's the hallway, hands clutching his wheels; he's staring at the floor, but the blond can tell anyway that despite being half hidden by his raven fringe his eyes are red and swollen from crying. He hates when his friend cries, and knowing he did it because of him hurts. Being close to someone who suffers from a mental illness isn't always easy, but Prompto knew that much already the moment he chose to be friends with Noctis and accepted all of the consequences coming from it. He himself has his ups and downs as well, so he understands; every good moment they have together is worth whatever struggle they might face anyway. The other had a bad week this time and he simply ended up being caught up in the storm, nothing that cannot be fixed.

"Hey," the prince greets, his tone a bit coarse from his recent melt down.

"Hi Noct," the blond replies, as he swiftly takes off his boots and follows towards the sofa, "where's Ignis?"

"Went out for a walk."

"So um, what did ya wanted to tell me? I'm not mad or anything..."

"I'm so sorry. You're always so good to me and I -" Noctis's voice breaks, and he swallows.

"It's okay buddy,"

"No it's not! I was stupid, and selfish and I hurt you," he yells, turning his face away to hide the tears staining his cheeks.

"And I forgive you Noct. You had a bad few days, that's it," Prompto reassures. He tries to hug him but to his surprise the other rejects him, pushing him away.

"Don't. I - there's something you need to know,"

"You know you can tell me everything, I'll listen." the blond replies, swallowing thickly. He knows about Noctis's past of self-harm, and he truly hopes his friend didn't fall back into that cycle, "not to urge you, but I'm dying with worry here."

"You're the best friend I ever had, and I, um," he gulps, fidgeting with his hair the way he does when he's uncomfortable, "I like you, in a more-than-friends way. I know you don't feel the same way I do, and it's totally fine, I get it. I just, needed you to know, that's it."

Prompto's mouth drops open and he's unable to say anything for a few moments, his brain stuck in a loop of trying to process what he just heard.

"I understand if you're not comfortable with being friends anymore," the prince cracks.

"No it's okay Noct," the blond babbles, his face redder than a Lucian tomato, as he could have never expected such a confession, "so um, you've just been tsundere this past week?" he nervously laughs.

"Shut it," the prince pouts, although his dorky friend still managed to gain a half-smile from him, "so you're not grossed out, you don't hate me and we can still be friends?"

"If you want me as a friend, yes," the blond smirks, elbowing the other boy.

"Stop it, it's not funny," the ravenette frowns, "so you want to be my friend?"

"No," Prompto grins, cupping the prince's cheek with his hand before he has the time to realize what's going on, "I want to be more than that."

 

 **Kissing Noctis is different** from how he imagined it, and he had imagined it a lot. He had a slight crush for him since pretty much the day they met, because who on Eos could resist those big blue eyes and baby face. It didn't take long for deeper feelings to develop either, as the boy proved to be incredibly sweet and funny once you got rid of the initial shy sulkiness and edgy aura. At some point Prompto had even considered to ask him out for a date, but eventually the royal status came into the equation and he decided he'd better forget about his feelings and try to be happy with just what he had; being friends with the heir to the throne is one thing, but dating him is not quite the same. He thought he'd never have a chance with someone like him, and even if he did some royal protocol would forbid it for sure.

Noctis's lips are slightly chapped against his, as he often bites on them as a relief from stress. They are incredibly squishy and sweet though, and even if this isn't Prompto's first kiss it's by far the best he ever had. It's sloppy and slow, and he can tell the prince isn't experienced, but it's so intense his heart is thrumming in his chest. The ravenette is shy at first, but then he finally parts his lip and lets him in; he takes it as an invite so he presses forward, letting his tongue dart out and timidly explore the other's mouth. Prompto wouldn't really care, but he expected him to taste like cigarettes, but to his pleasant surprise he doesn't, tasting like _Cool-Cool_ soda instead. They become more passionate then, there's a bit of teeth and the blond gently sucks on Noctis's lip before eventually parting to breath; he rests his forehead against the prince's, staring into those midnight blue orbs that stole his heart.

"Prompto, I thought you -"

"Shush, you have no idea how long I waited for this, dude" he grins, before placing a chaste peck on those luscious lips.

I thought you'd never like someone like me,"

"Why? Dude, you're fun and cute and also _hot_ "

"Dork! I was talking about my illness, and the wheelchair thing..."

It hurts to hear Noctis talking like that about himself, so Prompto holds him closer to his chest, "you know I don't care, I never have," he brushes softly his black hair, "and I honestly thought you'd never be interested into some useless pleb like me," he smiles, "but guess what dude, we were both wrong."

"I was so convinced you were into Ignis at some point,"

"What?! You can't be serious! Also don't you know he goes after Gladio?"

"Eugh, gross!"

"Right? But don't tell them I know, I'm scared shitless of Gladio!

"He's kind of a jerk sometimes, but he doesn't mean bad."

"So you guarantee he won't kill me when he finds out I'm messing with the prince now?"

"Not really if you're just messing as he's very protective of me, but if you become my boyfriend then he'll protect you as well as royal consort"

"Will you be my boyfriend, Noct?"

"Sure, dumbass, but I was joking,"

"And I was bloody serious dude. Will you be my boyfriend?"

Their second kiss is even better than the first, warm and tender as they start to know each other. They'll definitely won't be watching _Balamb Garden_ tonight.


	9. Strawberry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis and Prompto take their relationship further.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** blocks five and six (from _Noctis's heart races_ until the end) are nsfw, hence the change of rating. As usual I'll put a small summary in the end notes.  
>  **Message from the author:** I apologize for the delay in uploading this new chapter. I didn't feel too well these past weeks, so my writing schedule slowed down. Thank you to all of you who followed this fiction for so long, it truly means a lot to me and I'm amazed for all the nice feedback you gave me! It really keeps me going <3

**They've been together** for over three months, yet at times Prompto still thinks he's just dreaming. The luscious pair of lips pressed against his are unmistakably real though, he realizes, feeling them curl into a mischievous smirk before a familiar hint of teeth nips at his skin. Noctis is a natural talent, and since their first kiss he improved greatly; it took him very few tries to learn what Prompto likes the most, and what ultimately turns him on.

Prompto moans, deepening the kiss as he feels his groin stir; love bites are definitely his weakness. He so wishes he could have Noctis here and now, but he's well aware it's not a possibility. He sighs, of course since their relationship became somewhat official - or rather, official for the few people close to the prince as they still need to be extremely careful out in public to avoid a scandal - they were given some privacy, but in the little time they had to spend completely alone they could manage nothing more than a few shy handjobs while still fully clothed. That one time the blond attempted at sucking his boyfriend Ignis almost walked into them, and they both ended up blue-balled.

Their kiss heathens even more, Noctis pulling at his hips as they grind to each other; they're messily sprawled on the ravenette's bed, and Prompto prays the gods to lend him the strength of titan lest he's gonna lose control. Apparently they're deaf though, because his willpower falters and he soon finds his hands roaming under his boyfriend's t-shirt, slowly pulling at the hem.

What takes the love-hazed boy back to reality his Noctis's shaky hand, gripping at his as if he wanted to stop him, making him freeze.

"Noct, what's wrong?" the blond worries, abruptly ending the kiss. He's sure something's wrong given the way the prince shies his gaze; since they got together they began to learn how to recognize each other's emotions, so he doesn't believe the fake smile on his boyfriend's face. It's very Noctis to hide his true feelings and pretend he's alright when he's clearly not; he knows he does so not to be a burden and not to make others worry, but it's the blond's duty as a partner to be aware of that and encourage him not to keep everything inside.

"'s nothing," the ravenette slurs as expected, giving him no other choice than insist.

"Uh-uh, I made you uncomfortable and it's not okay," he softly says, leaving a small peck on the other's lips, "so please tell me so I won't do it again."

"Really, I'm fine," Noctis cuts off; then he tries to resume the kiss as if nothing happened but Prompto blocks him.

"Is it because of me?"

"Fuck no! You're perfect. It's just, I don't want to disappoint you," the prince sadly explains, making the blond's heart sink. He feels guilty for how stupid he was, as they've already discussed about this before. Noctis's extremely self-conscious about his body, so he prefers not to take off his t-shirt while others are around; and Prompto fucking pulled at it.

"I'm so sorry Noct," the blond mumbles, "I forgot for a moment about the t-shirt thing, but I won't do it ever again, I promise!"

  


**Noctis hates taking off** his t-shirt in front of others; most would assume he's simply a shy and reserved person, others like Gladio would mock him saying he's ashamed of showing his scrawny body. But none of those alternatives is the truth. The prince is pretty okay with being skinny, and in fact he has way more muscle than one would think - although you can't really see it. What makes him uncomfortable with showing his naked torso are his scars. His alabaster skin's littered with silver marks, an indelible remainder of some dark days in his life; he's not ashamed of them per se, as their fully healed state is the proof that he's fought and won some battles, but the questions and stolen glances coming from people still hurt. It's not like he can wear long sleeves all-year round though, so he learned how to handle the attention when it's just his arms; showing his chest still feels like baring his own soul though.

Prompto already knows about his past of self-harm, and he's indeed comfortable with showing him that. What he truly can't get over with is the stretched plastic-like mark disfiguring his back.

The hit from the Marilith sword cut across the young prince's back diagonally, from under his left shoulder-blade to his right hip. Normally only the Oracle's magic could have healed the Starscourge-tainted wound, but unfortunately said treatment was unavailable due to Sylva's premature death. Any other kid would have died, or worse transformed into a demon from such an injury, but the boy's connection with the Crystal as the Chosen cured the infection, while King Regis's spell took care of his maimed flesh. Not even magic can fix a severed spine though, so the young prince ended up being paralyzed from his waist down. However, what magic can't accomplish it still tries, especially when one's bond with the Crystal's as strong as Noctis's, so he gradually regained partial sensitivity to his lower limbs. Doctors couldn't understand the phenomenon at first, giving the boy false hope, but eventually the truth came to surface: the prince's innate powers constantly try to heal his broken body, and such intense magical activity allows some electric signal to be transmitted despite the cut nerves. Although the feeling in his legs improved since his magic got stronger, it's truly no more than a gimmick, and he will never walk again. Furthermore, the increased healing activity drains most of his magic, leaving him exhausted and unable to perform demanding spells. 

  


**"It's not like I can stay** dressed forever," Noctis sighs, "but I'm so fucking gross I-"

"Stop it," Prompto shushes his calmly. He lays his head on his boyfriend's thrumming chest, then continues, "I told you I don't care, you're gorgeous and a few scars can't change that."

"It's not just a few," the ravenette grumbles, "and that thing on my back's fucking hideous."

"Nothing of you can be hideous, Noct," he hugs him closer, "no matter how long it'll take to convince you, I'll wait."

"Promise me you'll still like me," the prince pleads, his eyes wet.

Noctis had the desire of making his relationship with Prompto more intimate for a while now, but baring his body's still scary. His boyfriend already saw the marks from his battle against depression, and he's completely comfortable with wearing short sleeves and boxers when they're together, but the slash on his back is a different story. He knows that Prompto is honest when he says he'll still like him no matter what, but a part of him finds it hard to believe him. How could the blond still find him attractive when he sees the discolored scar blemishing his back? It's raised and uneven to the touch, and some days it damn hurts.

"I promise, Noct," Prompto assures, forcing a smile before he clears his voice, "maybe it's not the same for you and probably it's not the best moment to say it, but I, uh, I - uhm," he gulps, "I love you."

Noctis's heart skips a beat; he's been sure about his own feelings for the blond for a long time now, but a part of him always had the doubt he didn't fully reciprocated. Of course Prompto liked him, but loving someone is something else.

Tears he didn't know he was holding suddenly fall, "I love you too," Noctis whispers, then he crashes his lips against his boyfriend's.

  


**Quickly the kissing** heats up; it's sloppy and desperate, brimming of the desire they have for each other. They're all tangled up in the moment, when Noctis guides Prompto's hands under his t-shirt, encouraging him to pull it up, "help me with this," he mutters."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

Their lips crash together again, and in a moment the prince's t-shirt falls discarded on the floor, immediately followed by his own. Noctis's the most gorgeous guy he's ever seen. His body's slender yet toned; lightly defined pectorals adorn his chest with soft lines, and baby abs, barely showing but definitely there embellish his stomach. His skin's perfectly shaved, and Prompto can't resist starting a trail of slow kisses down his neck, across his sternum, past his perfectly round belly button, and then all the way down to his waistband; he starts fumbling with the zipper when his boyfriend stops him, "I want to have real sex this time."

Prompto blushes at his boyfriend's blunt request; they had already discussed about the sex thing, and while he already had some experience, Noctis's still a virgin, so they decided to take it slow. Of course, the blond burns with desire, but he wants his boyfriend's first time to be better than his. Although he doesn't regret it in itself as it wasn't horrible or anything, he did it with someone he didn't truly cared about other than looks, and now his romantic side kind of wishes he'd waited for someone special. So if he can help it he wants Noctis's first time to be perfect.

"Are you sure? You know there's no rush," the blond inquires, staring at into his boyfriend's midnight blue eyes.

"Yeah I know, but I love you and I want you," the ravenette replies, his voice shaking a little out of embarrassment.

"But what if Ignis finds us? I don't wanna become stew!"

"He won't be here in an hour. Besides, he's okay with us being together."

"Okay then. Do you have lube and condoms?" Prompto purrs, sensually straddling Noctis's lap and caressing his sides.

"Second drawer. Ignis gave me _the talk_ that one time he found us sleeping together and bought me stuff," he snorts, pointing at his bedside table.

The blond bursts into laugher, "I'm thankful I wasn't around when momma Ignis taught you how not to get knocked up."

"Shut up dork!" Noctis protests, stretching to the side to retrieve the supplies from the drawer himself.

"You're adorable," Prompto kisses his neck then awkwardly attempts at a sexy voice, "so how do you wanna do it? I can ride you if you want."

"I - um actually I want you to fuck me," the prince stutters, his blush deepening into a nice burgundy color, "you said you never topped so I'd like my first time - _our_ first time to be something new for both of us.

"Are you sure? If you don't want me to ride you we can find some different position where you can top -"

"It's not that, I just want to be yours. If you're okay with topping I mean," 

"Of course I am, Noct," Prompto reassures him, pecking his lips. His heart beats fast in his chest; he's never topped before and he's scared he won't be good enough. Dammit, his boyfriend's so attractive there's the risk he'll finish before they even begin!

"The easiest way is if you lay on your stomach,"

  


**Noctis's heart races** in his chest; he's both excited and worried, because he's completely naked now, which he's never been in front of anyone since childdhood, plus turning around means Prompto will see his back. He takes a deep breath, then turns over quickly before he can change his mind. He expected to hear him sigh, or even laughter, but he feels his boyfriend's lips pressed between his shoulder-blades, kissing him softly instead.

"I love you so much, Noct," he whispers, hugging him gently. They cuddle for a short while, the blond's tender pecks reassuring him. Then Prompto takes a pillow and helps him place it under his hips to lift them a bit, mumbling something about it being better this way.

"So um, you sure?" the blond babbles, staring at the drops of shiny strawberry-flavored lube he just spread on his fingers.

"Yeah," Noctis replies, his voice a little coarse from the tension. It's not like he's never touched himself there before, because naturally a guy must experiment, but his fingers always remained shy and overly delicate. Prompto's index probing at his entrance's a very decisive presence instead, still not breaching, but definitely applying pressure.

"Relax," the blond hums, placing a sweet kiss on his lower back, "you ready?"

The ravenette takes a deep breath, then nods. As soon as his body begins to soften, Prompto's finger starts to enter him, naturally slipping in without the need of applying any more force. It feels weird and foreign, but it doesn't hurt, so he quickly loosens up until the single digit calmly gets knuckle deep.

The blond gives him a few moments to adjust, then he starts moving his finger, slowly dragging it in and out of the prince's tight body. After a short while the movement becomes firmer, as he tries to find his prostate. It takes a few attempts and angle variations, then he finally brushes against it dragging an airy gasp out of him.

Noctis relaxes under his boyfriend's gentle touch, carefully both preparing him and teasing him in the perfect blend. Being touched by someone else is completely different than doing it himself; it's better. Then a second finger joins the first, and he can feel the stretch this time; it stings slightly, but the discomfort fades quickly as his boyfriend knows what he's doing and easily targets his sweet spot.

"Prompto, please, I'm ready," Noctis pleads when the blond finally got three fingers inside him; he's rock-hard and he just can't wait anymore, the pressure on his cock trapped under his belly being too much to bear any longer.

"Okay," Prompto withdraws his fingers and rips a a packet with his teeth, then a slides a condom onto himself, smearing some more lube on top of it for good measure, "it can be a little uncomfortable at first, but it shouldn't be painful," he reminds, "so if it hurts, please tell me and I'll pull out."

"Alright," the ravenette reassures, although since they got this far he doesn't want to disappoint his boyfriend.

"Noct, promise me you won't be reckless," the blond insists; _geez_ , he got to know him so well; he'd gladly bear down a little pain if it meant pleasuring his partner, but he knows it would break his heart, so he finally nods, "I promise blondie, now put it in me before I chicken out."

The prince grimaces a little; everytime he's nervous he tends to act like a cheeky brat, even if he's aware it might hurt the ones he loves. He's clearly been too harsh now, and he truly hopes he didn't kill the mood, but the soft slap on his butt-cheek and the grin on Prompto's face's a good signal everything's fine.

The blond finally settles between Noctis's spread legs, then aligns himself with his entrance, "ready, buddy?"

He'd cringe at being called _buddy_ in this moment, but instead he barely notices, focused as he is on swallowing thickly and replying, "ready."

Prompto prepared him carefully, but a real cock's very different from fingers; the blunt tip pushes against his rim for a few endless moments, then it suddenly pops in. It stings vigorously, but it's not truly painful. He must've tensed up noticeably because his boyfriend doesn't move any further, starting to gently caress his sides in a soothing circular movement, "I'll pull out if it's too much."

"I'm fine, just give me a sec," the prince reassure, eventually releasing a breath he didn't know he was holding. The ache dulls quickly, so he elicits his boyfriend to move.

  


**Being inside of Noctis** feels unreal; he's incredibly tight and scorching hot, and not starting to relentlessly fuck him here and now's a job of endless willpower. Hurting him is the last thing on Eos he wants though, so he bites on his lip and takes a few deep breaths to keep patiently still. When eventually he confirms he's ready he gradually sinks in, constantly checking for signs of discomfort to be sure he's not overdoing it. Prompto can't help moan when he bottoms out, stopping there for a few moments to allow his boyfriend to adjust.

When the hinting wiggle of hips he was hoping for finally arrives he starts moving, dragging his cock in and out of the Prince's welcoming body in languid strokes. 

He's completely inexperienced on the matter, so it takes him a while to gain something remotely resembling a rhythm while adjusting the angle as well, but eventually he gains a shy moan from Noctis.

"You liked that?", he asks, trying his best to reply the movement; he must have accomplished because his boyfriend replies with another airy gasp, "yeah, there".

Another few strokes and the blond's already close, so he holds the prince tighter and help him roll to his side, so he can reach for his neglected cock; he starts pumping him eagerly, matching the now erratic hits of searching his own release, although he'll never allow himself over the edge before his partner.

Noctis's the first to come, timidly crying out and spurting on the blond's hand, who follows soon after. He's never had an orgasm this hard, and he'd do anything to just stay there and fall asleep, but luckily Prompto knows well enough to at least slip out and throw the condom away.

"Was good," Noctis slurs, his midnight blue eyes still hazed from the high.

"Yeah, you're perfect Noct and I love you so much," he's exhausted, but he finds the strength to press his lips against the prince's, who replies with a sloppy kiss somehow muttering he loves him too. He knows the sleepy boy beside him won't be able to stay awake any longer, let alone being functional, so he takes control and he reaches for some baby wipes in the drawer to clean both him and himself. He's way too tired to do a good job with himself, but he's tender and meticulous with the ravenette, even choosing a clean pair of briefs to dress him in the end.

Eventually when he fixed all the mess the blond crashes on the bed, hugging the already snoring prince all cuddled up under the covers; he breaths in the earthy scent of his messy locks, then closes his eyes, feeling like the luckiest man on Eos as he falls asleep.

  


**There's an unnatural silence** when Ignis steps inside the apartment. He smiles, blushing a little; dinner will be served when Noctis and Prompto wake up because not for a billion Yen he's gonna knock on their door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Trigger free summary:** Noctis and Prompto finally have sex. They're both consenting adults who do it safely, taking the needed precautions.
> 
> There's an unnatural silence when Ignis steps inside the apartment. He smiles, blushing a little; dinner will be served when Noctis and Prompto wake up because not for a billion Yen he's gonna knock on their door.


	10. The aquarium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompto reads something unbelievable on a social network.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Trigger warnings:** none.
> 
>  **Note from the author:** thank you to everyone who's still following this work, you all are the reason I keep writing! I'm greatful for all the kindness and support, whenever I read your comments it makes my day.  
> To K4tleya: you're the sweetest and I'm really happy we got to know each other, and finding out you are also reading this was an incredibly nice surprise!

**Arranged marriage's a common occurrence** among the Lucian crown family. King Regis, for instance, was set to marry Aulea, the eldest daughter of one of Insomnia's most influent households. Before him, Mors and countless other kings were betrothed for political reasons as well. Despite the kingdom officially lacking of a structured aristocracy and noble titles aside from those held by the monarch and his descendants, in fact during the centuries a few rich lineages had earned privileged access to positions inside the Council, to the point where some roles had practically become hereditary. Birthright acts actively, albeit unofficially, even in position regarding the King's inner entourage; a prominent example in this case is that of the Amicitias, who had provided _Shields_ since the rise of Lucis. Finally, a family like the Scientia recently started to be systematically endorsed with the role of retainers thanks to the academic accomplishments of some of its members; the peak was lately reached when the youngest Scientia, Ignis, was selected to become prince Noctis's royal advisor at the tender age of six.

Commonly the search for a suitable partner for the heir to the throne starts when said person reaches the age of eighteen, so the wedding ceremony can be organized soon after adulthood is legally reached at twenty.

  


**Noctis always dreaded** the thought of being promised to some woman he didn't know due to political reasons; firstly he isn't that much into women, and secondly he's a shy and reserved person who's kind of picky about the people he surrounds himself with. Of course, in the modern years the practice of arranging royal couples had evolved, starting to take into consideration matters like compatibility between the partners and their will, and in some cases the marriage ended up working pretty well. His parents were among the luckies, who eventually did fall in love with each other. But Noctis's situation's different, he already found his soulmate and he's called Prompto Argentum, a commoner who was adopted and probably was born in Niflheim.

When the two of them got together they had to discuss about a lot of things, from secrecy to avoid scandal to the possibility of having to part due to the prince's duties. Being discreet never was a problem for them, as they'd rather spend their time at Noctis's place playing videogames anyway, and the eventuality of an arranged marriage became more and more distant as time passed by. Since they met at eighteen, the search for a partner for the prince should have already begun, but apparently nothing was moving; therefore when he turned nineteen and eventually twenty and he still hadn't received any proposal the problem had long been forgotten. After all how good of trading material can a crippled prince be?

  


**When Prompto reads the news** on a _Kupogram_ post he almost drops the phone. Apparently Prince Noctis of Lucis is engaged to Lunafreya Nox Fleuret, Oracle and former princess of Tenebrae, to settle the armistice with the Niflheim Empire. He suddenly feels cold, as if his blood flow suddenly stopped, leaving his hands tingling and devoid of strength. This must be some kind of distasteful joke, because there's no way after so many years of war the King's giving up everything like this, in a treaty that robs him both of his land and his son. Regis's always been supportive of their relationship, and he can't believe he's forcing Noctis into some arranged marriage. He swallows thickly, trying to breathe; yeah, this must be some fake news that somehow went viral because there's no way he's discovering something like that from _Kupogram_ and not from his boyfriend.

Then his phone starts to ring.

"Prompto, it's me," something sounds off in his boyfriend's voice, which makes his anguish escalate.

"Noct, you gotta check Kupogram," he babbles; he's pretty sure the other already knows, as that's reasonably why he's calling. Who wouldn't be upset after seeing fake news about themselves after all?

"Shit. You saw it?" he's never heard Noctis sound this worried in a long time; doubtless it was since his father collapsed due to the strain of holding up the magic wall the summer prior. 

"Yeah, if I lay my hands the asshole who made up that bullshit I swear I...!"

"Wait calm down. Are you at home?" Noctis abruptly interrupts him.

"Um, no, I'm on the train I'll be home in five."

"Okay, good. I'm on my way there." 

"Noct, what's going on?" he tries his best to rationalize what's happening, but he just can't, not when Noctis's voice's shaking like that and nothing makes sense anymore. Fake news are bad, but there must be something more he doesn't know yet.

"Please listen, I'll explain. I'll be there in ten, okay?

  


**Prompto barely reached** the door of his house when a sleek black car pulls over. Noctis said he'd be there in ten minutes, but given his driving habits it was painfully obvious he would easily halve the estimated time. Since he received the "Star of Lucis" for his twentieth birthday, one-of-a-kind and custom made with all commands on the steering wheel so he could drive it, he had broken every speed limit around the city.

"So what's going on?" the blond asks, swiftly taking place on the passenger seat and fastening his belt.

"We'll talk when we're home," Noctis cuts off; in person his voice sounds even more distressed, and the way he's clenching the wheel leaving his knuckles white promises nothing good.

They stay silent the whole time, the prince drifting through Insomnia as if some invisible threaten was chasing them. Usually Prompto isn't bothered by his boyfriend's driving, but all that haste leaves a bad taste in his mouth; or maybe it's just because he's so worried he can barely swallow. In ten minutes the car's already parked and Noctis's heading to the elevator; in the past year he managed to get a decent control over his armiger, and he uses it to shove away his wheelchair whenever he doesn't need it.

  


**The metallic sound of his apartment's door** closing behind them makes Noctis wince; now it's time to spit it out.

He only found out himself a couple of hours earlier and he's far from having accepted it yet; honestly, given how things went he's surprised _he_ even managed to know before the press. His father called him personally on his mobile, asking him to immediately go to the Citadel; he never bothers to call himself to invite him for regular visits, so something serious was going on. He expected to be told that the Council had yet again something against him being the successor to the throne, but the truth wasn't anything like that; it was a billion times worse.

Noctis felt like an entire bucket full of ice was thrown at his, leaving him shaking and drowning. The Chancellor of Niflheim had proposed a treaty to end the war, and Lucis was going to sign it. The armistice itself was a bitter joke, as the Kingdom had to practically surrender all of its territories outside Insomnia; it was a suffered decision, but given the deterioration of the King's health it was a just a matter of time until something radical about the war had to be done. Powering the wall protecting Insomnia's a draining activity, and Regis, now in his fifties, would be able to continue do it only for a few years. Normally the next in line would inherit the ring and take his place, but Noctis's limited magical powers wouldn't allow him to sustain the city's defense. Hence the choice of signing a treaty that meant leaving behind all citizens living outside the capital.

As if technically losing the war wasn't painful enough, to settle the agreement Niflheim added another clause: the prince of Lucis was supposed to marry Lunafreya Nox Fleuret, former princess of Tenebrae.

The news hurt on so many levels Noctis thought he might pass out; everything he cared for was gone. Of course, if he truly wanted he could refuse to marry, but he could never sentence his people to another few years of war and dismal before the inevitable fall. He was well aware he was never meant to be free to live his life as he wished, and that very awareness was at the root of his depression. During the years he had come to accept his disability, but he never manager get over were the limitation it posed over his duties as future King; he would never be strong enough to be able to power the wall and protect his people, condemning him to fail as a ruler right from the start. Of course it wasn't his fault, but because of his inadequacy someone else would end up suffering in the end.

By marrying he could save his people, but Prompto, his beloved Prompto, would be a victim.

  


**"Please sit,"** Noctis asks, shifting himself to the sofa and letting his chair disappear into the armiger.

"Can't be that bad," Prompto jokes, nervously laughing as he indeed sits.

"So, they only told me this a couple of hours ago," the prince starts in a coarse voice, then lowers his eyes, "it's all true." 

The blond feels dizzy; he must've misheard. "What? Noct it's not funny," he nervously complains, although he's sure his boyfriend would never joke on something this serious.

"Listen, I'm so sorry," the ravenette cracks, biting his lip as his blue eyes glisten with trapped tears.

"Oh no, no this can't be real," he starts shaking, his own tears uncontrollably streaming down his freckled cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, I-" Noctis stutters; he tentatively moves as if he wants to hug the blond, but then stops, diving his hands into his lap instead.

"I was so stupid to believe being with you could last," Prompto spits, curling on his seat and trying to hide his face, looking away; he sloppily rubs his eyes to conceal the wetness, but it's all useless because his heart hurts too much and he can't damn stop crying.

"Prompto, please, you know I have no say in this," the prince sniffles, finally holding him close. It hurts, it hurts so much to be in those arms now, but the blond can't force himself to shy away from the bittersweet touch. He loves Noctis more than anything, and every moment with him is worth whatever fate may have planned for them.

"I don't want to lose you, it's not fair," he sobs, hiding his face in the rook of his boyfriend's neck and breathing in that earthy scent that feels like home.

"I know. I always thought I could marry _you_ some day," the ravenette whispers, softly caressing the other's golden locks, "because I love you more than my own life," his voice cracks; he takes a few deep breaths, then continues, "but if I don't marry Lunafreya to settle the treaty we're going to lose the war, and I can't let that happen."

"Noct -"

"Dad can only hold the wall for a few years, and I won't be able to do it in his place, and then -" the prince breaks holding his boyfriend tighter, "and then a lot of people will die. I can't let people die because of me, because I'm selfish and I can't do as little as marrying some woman."

"I'm sorry I -," Prompto mumbles, as he brushes away the hair stuck to his boyfriend's eyes, then gently wipes away a solitary tear from his cheek. He hates seeing him cry, but he's also so proud of him for how strong he's being; a couple years ago things would've been very different. "This is hard for the both of us. Fuck, it's harder for you than it is for me," he snuggles closer, resting his head on his shoulder.

"But I promise, even if I marry you're not losing me," the prince takes his hands, squishing them gently, "we don't have to stop seeing each other, as long we keep it private."

"Uh? Really?

"Yeah. It's not gonna be easy, but dad's okay with it. He likes you and he knows how much you mean to me, plus many past kings did have other relationship outside their official political marriage."

"So I'll be like some royal concubine or something?

the blond asks hesitantly; he's afraid of putting too much hope into it, but at this point hope's the  
only thing he has so a timid smile paints on his lips.

"More or less; you'll have to join the Crownsguard but that's it," he calmly explains, then add, "if you're okay with it, of course."

"If it means we can still be together of course I am!"

The ravenette smiles sadly, staring down at his boyfriend's hands he's still holding in his, "things are going to be different though, so it's your right to take your time to think about it, and I'll understand if you choose to say no."

"I love you and I want to be with you," his heart's uncomfortably pounding in his chest as he speaks. He's worried and scared because so many things could go wrong, but losing Noctis isn't an option, and it will never be. Although reality's harder than he could have ever imagined, when they got together he accepted the fact that being with the prince may require sacrifices some day, and now he's ready to do whatever it takes, "I won't give you up so easily."

"So you're with me?"

"Ever at your side," Prompto assures, wiping the tears on the prince's soft cheeks as he gets close, finally pressing their lips together in a desperate kiss. It's warm and slow, and they never kissed like this; it tastes salty because of they're both crying, but it's also sweet, and the hope it could last forever, because it's the last time they can pretend to be some normal couple, happy and carefree.

  


**Prompto's gorgeous in his suit** , and Noctis can't keep his eyes off him; he's wearing all black, as everybody in the royal entourage's supposed to. They made all of the paperwork that was required for him to join the Crownsguard in record time, so that he could be beside Noctis at the gala before the treaty signing; officially he's there to push the prince's wheelchair around, which is kind of annoying because he hates being pushed, but having him there's worth it. They're supposed to take part to the celebration, but soon enough they retired to the corner in front of the famous aquarium of the _Caelum Via_ , the luxury hotel the ceremony's held at.

"Prince Noctis, I'm happy to make your acquaintance," a young woman dressed in white greets him, "I'm Lunafreya."

"Nice to meet you too," he replies, doing his best not to start laughing as he sees Prompto bowing; he's doing a great job at pretending he's just some guard and not his partner. He admires Prompto for how strong he's being, as he's not sure he could manage to keep his composure if their roles were swapped. Watching your beloved interact with his bride-to-be must be deeply painful.

"Are you enjoying the night so far, miss Lunafreya?" a Kingsglaive approaches, offering a glass of white whine to Lunafreya and then bowing at the sight of the prince.

"Yes, thank you, Nyx," she replies, holding the glass with her slim fingers; then she acknowledges the ravenette boy, "Prince Noctis, I apologize as this is not the suitable place, but time's pending and as the Oracle it's my duty to discuss with you about the prophecy.

"Because I'm the chosen?" Noctis guesses, trying his best not to sound too dumb; _geez_ , he's not good at talking.

"Yes. You are the King of Light, Chosen by the Gods to eradicate the darkness from this world," she takes a pause, probably because of the puzzled looked on the prince's face, "I know this sounds incredible, but please, listen. I'll soon begin a journey across Eos to forge a covenant with the Gods, so when the time comes they'll lend you the power to purge the star. I beg you, prince Noctis, promise me you'll fulfill your calling."

He was told about the prophecy when he was younger and he even asked his dad about it a few times, but he never got any good answers. In fact, after a few attempts he stopped questioning, as the topic seemed to make Regis deeply sad.

"I think I can do it," he assures, "but what am I supposed to do?"

"When the times comes you'll know," she smiles.

Noctis's about to protest, but he's interrupted as the bursting sound of explosions shakes the building.


	11. Ever at your side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The treaty signing doesn't go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I haven't posted in a long time, and I apologize. Most of the time I'm basically too tired to do anything after work, so writing fell on the side... But I'm back now, as I really care for this fiction and I want it finished! There's still one chapter to go, which means I can probably do it in a reasonable time (fingers crossed!).  
> Thank you to everyone who will still read this after such a long pause, I really appreciate your patience and support guys <3

Prompto adjusts his tie for the billionth time, then turns to Noctis who reassures him in a broad smile. He's never attended any formal event before, and officially being the prince's personal attendant at nothing less than the treaty signing celebration is a way to start; he's definitely not royalty, and the feeling he's just an impostor who doesn't belong there's twisting his gut. He swallows thickly, then finally guides Noctis towards the aquarium area; they spent the past twenty minutes greeting guests, which was possibly the most terrifying thing he's ever done, and he's glad that for once the ravenette's health's a good excuse to retire to a quieter area; nobody would ever argue if he claimed to be tired and in need for some rest.

The aquarium's gorgeous, and it's no surprise that Insomnia's most luxurious hotel and now location of the celebration event is renowned for it. The marine exhibit's inhabited by the most mesmerizing creatures he's ever seen; serpent-like fishes swim around in swirls, their glittering bodies infused with the beauty of their ancient and god-like appearance. Aside from the unique fishes, the aquarium has another peculiarity: it is the home of the oldest painting of Etro that survived until current times. The former deity was said to be the prominent goddess in Solheim's pantheon, but due to her connection with death her cult was eventually banned and forgotten; only a few effigies survived, the canvas displayed at the _Caelum Via_ being the most beautiful and well preserved. The blond stares at Etro's figure for a few moments; he studied everything about that portrait during his art classes, and he could have never imagined that some day he would see it in person. Her stunning yet melancholic appearance reminds him of Noctis, and it's not a coincidence how the emblems of her former cult, like skulls, had seeped into the imagery of the Crown family itself.

Prompto's still deeply lost in his thoughts when a young woman approaches them; her beauty's almost ethereal with her light blond hair and white dress, and her calm voice makes her look even more magical. She's Lunafreya Nox Fleuret, Oracle and Noctis's fiancée.

He dreaded the moment they'd finally come face to face, because then he couldn't stop himself from hating her; but now that she's standing in front of him all the resentment's gone. There's sadness in her eyes, and no matter how glowing her beauty is, the tiredness of her body still shows, proving how the burden on her shoulders is just as heavy as Noctis's and his. The looks she exchanges with the Kingsglaive escorting her is proof that marrying a boy four years younger than her wasn't in her plan either. She's just another victim in the bigger picture, Prompto realizes, and cannot be hostile toward her; thing are already hard enough as is.

  


Suddenly the windows burst, shattered in a million pieces by a magitek airship that crashed into the building. The floor's shaking from the impact, and Prompto's first instinct's to cover Noctis, only letting him go when the vibrations subside. Around them a magic barrier's glowing as Nyx promptly summoned it to shield them from the shards. The room's filled with screams at this point, as imperial troupes are swarming the hall.

"Your Highness, we must get out of here!" Ignis incites, his daggers clutched in his hands as he strikes yet another magitek soldier; obviously he and Gladio were both attending the event as well, but somehow the blond couldn't register the exact moment they reached them. In fact, his ears are buzzing and it's hard to focus; he knows he should react to what Ignis said, he should be steering Noctis at least, but for some reason his body feels too heavy to move.

"Prompto, are you okay?" the prince asks, getting as close to the blond as his sitting position allows him, "shit! Prompto!"

He has now idea why he's laying on the floor now, probably his wobbly legs couldn't just hold his weight anymore. He feels a sharp pain in his side, and suddenly it's getting hard to breathe. Oh, and why is Noctis on top of him now?

  


"No no Prompto, stay with me!" the prince yells, his hands tightly pressed to the bloody gash under his boyfriends's ribs. Dumbass jumped in front of him when the windows exploded and got hit by a shard, and now he's dying; because he wanted to protect him. Tears are freely streaming down his face; he's never been this scared before.

Around them a dreadful skirmish's taking place, with Ignis and Gladio barely keeping the enemy infantry at bay while Nyx's busy covering the the others with his magic barrier.

"Noctis, we must go!" Gladio growls, knocking down two troopers with his broadsword.

The prince's shaken by sobs, his hands still clutching Prompto's wounded side; his suit's already drenched in blood. If he weren't such a failure of a prince he could cast a spell and heal him in no time, but he can't, no matter how hard he tries. All he's capable of is concocting potions from energy drinks, but he doesn't have any at hand right now and they're of no use for anything more than a mere scratch anyway.

"'m sorry Noct," Prompto slurs, trying to wipe away the tears running down his boyfriend's cheek with a trebling hand, "I didn't wanna make you cry."

"It's okay, just stay awake," the ravenette sniffles, "everything will be fine."

"I love you Noct,"

"Prom,

"I've never done it before, but I cannot watch this happen," Lunafreya hurries, kneeling down beside Noctis and entwining her slender fingers with his; then a glowing light emanates from her touch, making Prompto gasp.

The Oracle's lineage was bestowed by the Gods with the power to cure people affected by the Miasma, but the gleaming energy flowing from Luna's hands is the proof that such gift can also be used to heal.

"What happened?" Prompto slurs, rubbing his hand over the fresh scarring of some perfectly healed deadly wound.

"You got hurt, dumbass!" Noctis blurts; he's still shaking and his cheeks are streaked with tears, "but Lunafreya patched you up."

"Oh really? Thank you miss Lunafreya, I thought I was a goner" the blond babbles, trying his best to sit up despite still being a little dizzy.

"I'm sorry to break this up, but we gotta go, lovebirds," Nyx interrupts, helping Prompto to his feet and entrusting Noctis into Gladiolus's strong arms.

  


The rush to the Citadel is hectic and scattered with skirmishes, but no magitek soldier can resist Nyx's and Ignis's daggers.

According to the Oracle, who has a surprisingly deep knowledge of the Prophecy, they must reach the Crystal so that the prince can gain the power of the Gods he needs to banish the darkness. Of course, Noctis doesn't give a shit about some old fairytale as of now he's way more concerned with his father's wellbeing, but he could really use some superpowers to kick the imperials back to Niflheim so he gladly follows Luna's plan.

"This belongs to you, Prince Noctis," Lunafreya says in front of the Crystal's chamber, offering him a ring; it's the Ring of the Lucii, vessel of Lucian king's magic.

"That's my father's," the ravenette recognizes it, hesitantly taking it, "how did you get it?".

"At the gala the King asked me to keep it safe and deliver it to you," she explains, "you'll need it to absorb magic from the Crystal."

"So that's it? I just touch that rock and I'll gain its power?" The prince asks, glancing the dark orb behind him.

"Unfortunately no. You'll also have to collect the Royal Arms of your ancestors as you'll need them on the battle to purge the Star, while I'll have to forge a covenant with the Gods on your behalf."

  


It hurts when Noctis puts on the ring; it feels like fire is burning inside his veins up and his arm. He bites his lip not to scream, only to whimper softly when he sees the terrified look on his boyfriend's face.

"Noct, your hand..."

He swallows thickly at the sight of his own charred fingers; his skin looks ashen, cracked in several places and with and incandescent glow seeping from the inside. It really looks like he's burning from the inside out.

"I'm fine," he assures, stopping in front of Prompto on his way towards the Crystal for a quick peck on the lips; his heart wants to hold him close and kiss him properly, but he's afraid he'd hurt him if he touches him now. Geez, with his skin ablaze he's worried he'd melt his wheelchair if he grips it too tight.

  


Nobody had a better knowledge and understanding of the Prophecy; she fully knew the consequences of cleansing the world from the Starscourge, and she had long accepted her fate; yet, neither her could suspect Noctis would get sucked into the Crystal the very moment he laid his hand on it to absorb its power.

  


He's never seen this place so dimly lit, Noctis notices, as he takes his time to appreciate the exquisitely decorated walls and ceiling. When his father used to sit there, on the very same throne where he is sitting right now, the room used to be brightly illuminated all the time, day and night. But now, after almost a whole year of darkness, not even the house of the Lucis Caelums, the bringers of light in the sky, is bright anymore. When he got sucked into the crystal after the fall of Insomnia the sun only irradiated Eos for a few weeks, nights growing longer and longer; or so his friends told him when he woke up in a cave in Angelgard a couple of days prior.

A lot of things changed in the past year, and Noctis, now King, still has to stomach them all. The treaty signing was a trap, which lead the Kingdom to an inevitable defeat and cost his father's premature death. Of course the late King Regis wasn't a fool, and he had arranged a plan to help Noctis fulfill his destiny. The Marshal of the Crownsguard, Cor Leonis, was instructed with the order to help the prince and his entourage on their journey to retrieve the Arms of the Ancient Kings; of course, he couldn't imagine that in the end they would have to follow that path in almost total darkness and without the heir to the throne, who was busy absorbing the power of the Crystal. As the pilgrimage to the Royal tombs went on, Lunafreya's journey proceeded as well; escorted by the Kingsglaive Nyx, she travelled across Eos to forge a covenant with the Gods to help Noctis gain the power necessary to banish the darkess.

What still shakes Noctis the most is how he didn't have a say in any of that; his father kept the truth from him, never telling him what being the Chosen meant. Lunafreya didn't warn him either, but he cannot blame her as they didn't know each other and she owed him no explanation. He smiles sadly; a part of him kind of understands why Regis never told him the full implications of the prophecy. How can someone even say his twenty years old disabled son that he has to sacrifice his life to save the world? After all since the accident all his father did was trying to protect him and give him the most happy and normal life he could.

There was a time where Noctis longed for death; he was depressed for years, and when he reached the bottom he tried to kill himself, too tired of all the suffering he had to bear in his short life. But then things improved: he started therapy, he met friends and eventually love. Before all of that armistice crap he was _happy_. He gets why his father chose not to tell him about his destiny, he didn't want to break the fragile peace he eventually reached. Noctis isn't angry with his dad, he just wishes he could have said him a proper goodbye.

It was hard to accept that he would have to die to fix the Gods' mistakes and purge the star. It wasn't really the fear of death that made him falter though, it was Prompto. He had promised Prompto that no matter what he'd never leave him, and he already messed that up enough by being sucked inside that goddamn Crystal for a year. It tortures him that he has to die and inevitably break his promise now. Yet, he cannot deny his duty and condemn his people to perpetual darkness, so he's sitting on the throne with his father's sword tightly gripped in hand as he gathers the courage to finally make things right. He's doing this for Prompto too; he's the love of his life and he deserves a bright future in the sunlight.

The battle itself was the easiest part, as with powers so strong that made his body levitate defeating Ardyn was a breeze. The man was barely fighting back, as if his true desire was death, so it was all over in mere minutes. Then came the worst.

Bidding Prompto farewell broke Noctis's heart. The blond tried his best to stay strong until the end, telling jokes and offering his boyfriends a can of Ebony from the vending machine so that they'd _"have to see each other again"_ like the first time they met. But eventually, as he pushed Noctis's wheelchair up the ramp toward the throne his eyes were welling up with tears.

  


"I want to stay," Prompto tells, his voice barely cracking. Noctis knows that it's taking the blond everything he's got not to burst into tears, and he's thankful that he's being so strong, because if he openly cried he'd never have the guts to go on with his duty.

"It won't be a pretty sight, so I'd rather not have you see it," he replies calmly, taking a deep breath to cover how his heart hammers in his chest.

"Please, I love you and I don't want you to remember me like this," Noctis's throat is dry and it's hard to swallow, "I want you to remember that time when we went to the chocobo post for your birthday, or when we went fishing in Galdin although I suspect it wasn't that fun for you that time..."

"Noct..."

"Please, promise me you won't look at what happens in here," the ravenette begs.

"But I don't want you to go, and I hate myself for being so selfish," Prompto croaks, rubbing his swollen eyes not to let a single tear fall.

"Come here," Noctis makes him sit on his knees, pushing his forehead against the blond's, "if it were for me I'd rather stay with you, but I have to do it. To bring back the light and give my people the future they deserve. To give _you_ the future you deserve. Everything will be fine, once the sun comes back you'll help Ignis and Gladio rebuild the Country, and eventually you'll be happy again."

"I love you so much Noct," Prompto mutters, "I know you have to do it and I'm so proud of you. But it hurts..."

"I know, but I promise you'll be fine," he kisses the blond's head softly, "can you make me a promise?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Prompto nods, sniffling a little.

"When you find someone, please don't hold onto the past. I'd rather have you happy with someone else, than wasting your life to be loyal to me because of that silly promise _"ever at your side"_ that we made or something.

"I don't know if I can do it..."

"Just promise me you'll try, okay?" Noctis's voice shakes; saying this hurts like hell, but he truly means it.

"I promise. I love you Noct."

"I love you too, Prompto. Always.

  


Their last kiss is sad, but slow and gentle, full of all the love they share for each other. There's no bitterness, no regret. Only the tenderness of the first love. 

Prompto doesn't let a single tear fall until he's out of the throne room, where Ignis, Gladio, Lunafreya and Nyx are waiting for him. It hurts so much that it feels like he can't feel a thing anymore. Has he forgotten how to breathe? Is his heart still beating? When he lost Noctis for a whole year he thought he'd eventually die because of the pain, but at that time the hope of him coming back one day kept him going. But what does he have to hold onto now?

  


Noctis clutches the hilt of his father's sword. Now that he told Prompto everything he needed he's finally ready; the world had been in the darkness for long enough.

"Kings of Lucis, come to me!" the young King orders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this! Comments and kudos are always highly appreciated <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this fiction. Don't be shy and feel free to leave kudos or a comment if you liked it! <3


End file.
